psychology essay about yourself

What is Self-Esteem? A Psychologist Explains

“Believe in yourself.”

That is the message that we encounter constantly, in books, television shows, superhero comics, and common myths and legends.

We are told that we can accomplish anything if we believe in ourselves.

Of course, we know that to be untrue; we cannot accomplish anything in the world simply through belief—if that were true, a lot more children would be soaring in the skies above their garage roof instead of lugging around a cast for a few weeks!

However, we know that believing in yourself and accepting yourself for who you are is an important factor in success, relationships, and happiness and that self-esteem plays an important role in living a flourishing life . It provides us with belief in our abilities and the motivation to carry them out, ultimately reaching fulfillment as we navigate life with a positive outlook.

Various studies have confirmed that self-esteem has a direct relationship with our overall wellbeing, and we would do well to keep this fact in mind—both for ourselves and for those around us, particularly the developing children we interact with.

Before you read on, we thought you might like to download our three Self-Compassion Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will not only help you show more compassion to yourself but will also give you the tools to enhance the self-compassion of your clients, students or employees and lead them to a healthy sense of self-esteem.

This Article Contains:

• What is the Meaning of Self-esteem? A Definition

Self-Esteem and Psychology

Incorporating self-esteem in positive psychology, 22 examples of high self-esteem, 18 surprising statistics and facts about self-esteem, relevant research, can we help boost self-esteem issues with therapy and counseling, the benefits of developing self-esteem with meditation, can you test self-esteem, and what are the problems with assessment, 17 factors that influence self-esteem, the effects of social media, 30 tips & affirmations for enhancing self-esteem, popular books on self-esteem (pdf), ted talks and videos on self-esteem, 15 quotes on self-esteem, a take-home message, what is the meaning of self-esteem.

You probably already have a good idea, but let’s start from the beginning anyway: what is self-esteem?

Self-esteem refers to a person’s overall sense of his or her value or worth. It can be considered a sort of measure of how much a person “values, approves of, appreciates, prizes, or likes him or herself” (Adler & Stewart, 2004).

According to self-esteem expert Morris Rosenberg, self-esteem is quite simply one’s attitude toward oneself (1965). He described it as a “favourable or unfavourable attitude toward the self”.

Various factors believed to influence our self-esteem include:

• Personality
• Life experiences
• Social circumstances
• The reactions of others
• Comparing the self to others

An important note is that self-esteem is not fixed. It is malleable and measurable, meaning we can test for and improve upon it.

Self-esteem and self-acceptance are often confused or even considered identical by most people. Let’s address this misconception by considering some fundamental differences in the nature and consequences of self-esteem and unconditional self-acceptance.

• Self-esteem is based on evaluating the self, and rating one’s behaviors and qualities as positive or negative, which results in defining the self as worthy or non-worthy (Ellis, 1994).
• Self-acceptance, however, is how the individual relates to the self in a way that allows the self to be as it is. Acceptance is neither positive nor negative; it embraces all aspects and experiences of the self (Ellis, 1976).
• Self-esteem relies on comparisons to evaluate the self and ‘decide’ its worth.
• Self-acceptance, stems from the realization that there is no objective basis for determining the value of a human being. So with self-acceptance, the individual affirms who they are without any need for comparisons.
• Self-esteem is contingent on external factors, such as performance, appearance, or social approval, that form the basis on which the self is evaluated.
• With self-acceptance, a person feels satisfied with themselves despite external factors, as this sense of worthiness is not derived from meeting specific standards.
• Self-esteem is fragile (Kernis & Lakey, 2010).
• Self-acceptance provides a secure and enduring positive relationship with the self (Kernis & Lakey, 2010).
• When it comes to the consequences on wellbeing, while self-esteem appears to be associated with some markers of wellbeing, such as high life satisfaction (Myers & Diener, 1995) and less anxiety (Brockner, 1984), there is also a “dark side” of self-esteem, characterized by egotism and narcissism (Crocker & Park, 2003).
• Self-acceptance is strongly associated with numerous positive markers of general psychological wellbeing (MacInnes, 2006).

Self-esteem has been a hot topic in psychology for decades, going about as far back as psychology itself. Even Freud , who many consider the founding father of psychology (although he’s a bit of an estranged father at this point), had theories about self-esteem at the heart of his work.

What self-esteem is, how it develops (or fails to develop) and what influences it has kept psychologists busy for a long time, and there’s no sign that we’ll have it all figured out anytime soon!

While there is much we still have to learn about self-esteem, we have at least been able to narrow down what self-esteem is and how it differs from other, similar constructs. Read on to learn what sets self-esteem apart from other self-directed traits and states.

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Concept

Self-esteem is not self-concept, although self-esteem may be a part of self-concept. Self-concept is the perception that we have of ourselves, our answer when we ask ourselves the question “Who am I?” It is knowing about one’s own tendencies, thoughts, preferences and habits, hobbies, skills, and areas of weakness.

Put simply, the awareness of who we are is our concept of our self .

Purkey (1988) describes self-concept as:

“the totality of a complex, organized, and dynamic system of learned beliefs, attitudes and opinions that each person holds to be true about his or her personal existence”.

According to Carl Rogers, founder of client-centered therapy , self-concept is an overarching construct that self-esteem is one of the components of it (McLeod, 2008).

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Image

Another similar term with a different meaning is self-image; self-image is similar to self-concept in that it is all about how you see yourself (McLeod, 2008). Instead of being based on reality, however, it can be based on false and inaccurate thoughts about ourselves. Our self-image may be close to reality or far from it, but it is generally not completely in line with objective reality or with the way others perceive us.

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Worth

Self-esteem is a similar concept to self-worth but with a small (although important) difference: self-esteem is what we think, feel, and believe about ourselves, while self-worth is the more global recognition that we are valuable human beings worthy of love (Hibbert, 2013).

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Confidence

Self-esteem is not self-confidence ; self-confidence is about your trust in yourself and your ability to deal with challenges, solve problems, and engage successfully with the world (Burton, 2015). As you probably noted from this description, self-confidence is based more on external measures of success and value than the internal measures that contribute to self-esteem.

One can have high self-confidence, particularly in a certain area or field, but still lack a healthy sense of overall value or self-esteem.

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Efficacy

Similar to self-confidence, self-efficacy is also related to self-esteem but not a proxy for it. Self-efficacy refers to the belief in one’s ability to succeed at certain tasks (Neil, 2005). You could have high self-efficacy when it comes to playing basketball, but low self-efficacy when it comes to succeeding in math class.

Unlike self-esteem, self-efficacy is more specific rather than global, and it is based on external success rather than internal worth.

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Compassion

Finally, self-esteem is also not self-compassion. Self-compassion centers on how we relate to ourselves rather than how we judge or perceive ourselves (Neff, n.d.). Being self-compassionate means we are kind and forgiving to ourselves, and that we avoid being harsh or overly critical of ourselves. Self-compassion can lead us to a healthy sense of self-esteem, but it is not in and of itself self-esteem.

We explore this further in The Science of Self-Acceptance Masterclass© .

Esteem in Maslow’s Theory – The Hierarchy of Needs

The mention of esteem may bring to mind the fourth level of Maslow’s pyramid : esteem needs.

While these needs and the concept of self-esteem are certainly related, Maslow’s esteem needs are more focused on external measures of esteem, such as respect, status, recognition, accomplishment, and prestige (McLeod, 2017).

There is a component of self-esteem within this level of the hierarchy, but Maslow felt that the esteem of others was more important for development and need fulfillment than self-esteem.

Download 3 Free Self-Compassion Exercises (PDF)

These detailed, science-based exercises will equip you to help others create a kinder and more nurturing relationship with themselves.

Download 3 Free Self-Compassion Tools Pack (PDF)

By filling out your name and email address below.

Dr. Martin Seligman has some concerns about openly accepting self-esteem as part of positive psychology . He worries that people live in the world where self-esteem is injected into a person’s identity, not caring in how it is done, as long as the image of “confidence” is obtained. He expressed the following in 2006:

I am not against self-esteem, but I believe that self-esteem is just a meter that reads out the state of the system. It is not an end in itself. When you are doing well in school or work, when you are doing well with the people you love, when you are doing well in play, the meter will register high. When you are doing badly, it will register low. (p. v)

Seligman makes a great point, as it is important to take his words into consideration when looking at self-esteem. Self-esteem and positive psychology may not marry quite yet, so it is important to look at what research tells us about self-esteem before we construct a rationale for it as positive psychology researcher, coach, or practitioner.

Examples of these characteristics are being open to criticism, acknowledging mistakes, being comfortable with giving and receiving compliments, and displaying a harmony between what one says, does, looks, sounds, and moves.

People with high self-esteem are unafraid to show their curiosity, discuss their experiences, ideas, and opportunities. They can also enjoy the humorous aspects of their lives and are comfortable with social or personal assertiveness (Branden, 1992).

Although low self-esteem has received more attention than high self-esteem, the positive psychology movement has brought high self-esteem into the spotlight. We now know more about what high self-esteem looks like and how it can be cultivated.

We know that people with high self-esteem:

• Appreciate themselves and other people.
• Enjoy growing as a person and finding fulfillment and meaning in their lives.
• Are able to dig deep within themselves and be creative.
• Make their own decisions and conform to what others tell them to be and do only when they agree.
• See the word in realistic terms, accepting other people the way they are while pushing them toward greater confidence and a more positive direction.
• Can easily concentrate on solving problems in their lives.
• Have loving and respectful relationships.
• Know what their values are and live their lives accordingly.
• Speak up and tell others their opinions, calmly and kindly, and share their wants and needs with others.
• Endeavor to make a constructive difference in other people’s lives (Smith & Harte, n.d.).

We also know that there are some simple ways to tell if you have high self-esteem. For example, you likely have high self-esteem if you:

• Act assertively without experiencing any guilt, and feel at ease communicating with others.
• Avoid dwelling on the past and focus on the present moment.
• Believe you are equal to everyone else, no better and no worse.
• Reject the attempts of others to manipulate you.
• Recognize and accept a wide range of feelings, both positive and negative, and share them within your healthy relationships.
• Enjoy a healthy balance of work, play, and relaxation .
• Accept challenges and take risks in order to grow, and learn from your mistakes when you fail.
• Handle criticism without taking it personally, with the knowledge that you are learning and growing and that your worth is not dependent on the opinions of others.
• Value yourself and communicate well with others, without fear of expressing your likes, dislikes, and feelings.
• Value others and accept them as they are without trying to change them (Self Esteem Awareness, n.d.).

Based on these characteristics, we can come up with some good examples of what high self-esteem looks like.

Imagine a high-achieving student who takes a difficult exam and earns a failing grade. If she has high self-esteem, she will likely chalk up her failure to factors like not studying hard enough, a particularly difficult set of questions, or simply having an “off” day. What she doesn’t do is conclude that she must be stupid and that she will probably fail all future tests too.

Having a healthy sense of self-esteem guides her toward accepting reality, thinking critically about why she failed, and problem-solving instead of wallowing in self-pity or giving up.

For a second example, think about a young man out on a first date. He really likes the young woman he is going out with, so he is eager to make a good impression and connect with her. Over the course of their discussion on the date, he learns that she is motivated and driven by completely different values and has very different taste in almost everything.

Instead of going along with her expressed opinions on things, he offers up his own views and isn’t afraid to disagree with her. His high self-esteem makes him stay true to his values and allows him to easily communicate with others, even when they don’t agree. To him, it is more important to behave authentically than to focus on getting his date to like him.

23 Examples of Self-Esteem Issues

Here are 23 examples of issues that can manifest from low self-esteem:

• You people please
• You’re easily angered or irritated
• You feel your opinion isn’t important
• You hate you
• What you do is never good enough
• You’re highly sensitive to others opinions
• The world doesn’t feel safe
• You doubt every decision
• You regularly experience the emotions of sadness and worthlessness
• You find it hard keeping relationships
• You avoid taking risks or trying new things
• You engage in addictive avoidance behaviors
• You struggle with confidence
• You find it difficult creating boundaries
• You give more attention to your weaknesses
• You are often unsure of who you are
• You feel negative experiences are all consuming
• You struggle to say no
• You find it difficult asking for your needs to be met
• You hold a pessimistic or negative outlook on life
• You doubt your abilities or chances of success
• You frequently experience negative emotions, such as fear, anxiety or depression
• You compare yourself with others and often you come in second best

It can be hard to really wrap your mind around self-esteem and why it is so important. To help you out, we’ve gathered a list of some of the most significant and relevant findings about self-esteem and low self-esteem in particular.

Although some of these facts may make sense to you, you will likely find that at least one or two surprise you—specifically those pertaining to the depth and breadth of low self-esteem in people (and particularly young people and girls).

• Adolescent boys with high self-esteem are almost two and a half times more likely to initiate sex than boys with low self-esteem, while girls with high self-esteem are three times more likely to delay sex than girls with low self-esteem (Spencer, Zimet, Aalsma, & Orr, 2002).
• Low self-esteem is linked to violence, school dropout rates, teenage pregnancy, suicide, and low academic achievement (Misetich & Delis-Abrams, 2003).
• About 44% of girls and 15% of boys in high school are attempting to lose weight (Council on Alcoholism and Drug Abuse, n.d.).
• Seven in 10 girls believe that they are not good enough or don’t measure up in some way (Dove Self-Esteem Fund, 2008).
• A girl’s self-esteem is more strongly related to how she views her own body shape and body weight than how much she actually weighs (Dove Self-Esteem Fund, 2008).
• Nearly all women (90%) want to change at least one aspect of their physical appearance (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).
• The vast majority (81%) of 10-year old girls are afraid of being fat (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).
• About one in four college-age women have an eating disorder (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).
• Only 2% of women think they are beautiful (Confidence Coalition, n.d.).
• Absent fathers, poverty, and a low-quality home environment have a negative impact on self-esteem (Orth, 2018).

These facts on low self-esteem are alarming and disheartening, but thankfully they don’t represent the whole story. The whole story shows that there are many people with a healthy sense of self-esteem, and they enjoy some great benefits and advantages. For instance, people with healthy self-esteem:

• Are less critical of themselves and others.
• Are better able to handle stress and avoid the unhealthy side effects of stress.
• Are less likely to develop an eating disorder.
• Are less likely to feel worthless, guilty, and ashamed .
• Are more likely to be assertive about expressing and getting what they want.
• Are able to build strong, honest relationships and are more likely to leave unhealthy ones.
• Are more confident in their ability to make good decisions.
• Are more resilient and able to bounce back when faced with disappointment, failure, and obstacles (Allegiance Health, 2015).

Given the facts on the sad state of self-esteem in society and the positive outcomes associated with high self-esteem, it seems clear that looking into how self-esteem can be built is a worthwhile endeavor.

Luckily, there are many researchers who have tackled this topic. Numerous studies have shown us that it is possible to build self-esteem, especially in children and young people.

How? There are many ways!

Recent research found a correlation between self-esteem and optimism with university students from Brazil (Bastianello, Pacico & Hutz & 2014). One of the most interesting results came from a cross-cultural research on life satisfaction and self-esteem, which was conducted in 31 countries.

They found differences in self-esteem between collective and individualistic cultures with self-esteem being lower in collectivist cultures. Expressing personal emotions, attitudes, and cognitive thoughts are highly associated with self-esteem, collectivist cultures seem to have a drop in self-esteem because of a lack of those characteristics (Diener & Diener 1995).

China, a collectivist culture, found that self-esteem was a significant predictor of life satisfaction (Chen, Cheung, Bond & Leung, 2006). They found that similar to other collectivist cultures, self-esteem also had an effect on resilience with teenagers. Teenagers with low self-esteem had a higher sense of hopelessness and had low resilience (Karatas, 2011).

In more individualistic cultures, teenagers who were taught to depend on their beliefs, behaviors, and felt open to expressing their opinion had more resilience and higher self-esteem (Dumont & Provost, 1999).

School-based programs that pair students with mentors and focus on relationships, building, self-esteem enhancements, goal setting , and academic assistance have been proven to enhance students’ self-esteem, improve relationships with others, reduce depression and bullying behaviors (King, Vidourek, Davis, & McClellan, 2009).

Similarly, elementary school programs that focus on improving self-esteem through short, classroom-based sessions also have a positive impact on students’ self-esteem, as well as reducing problem behaviors and strengthening connections between peers (Park & Park, 2014).

However, the potential to boost your self-esteem and reap the benefits is not limited to students! Adults can get in on this endeavour as well, although the onus will be on them to make the changes necessary.

Self-esteem researcher and expert Dr. John M. Grohol outlined six practical tips on how to increase your sense of self-esteem, which include:

6 Practical Tips on How to Increase Self-Esteem

1. take a self-esteem inventory to give yourself a baseline..

It can be as simple as writing down 10 of your strengths and 10 of your weaknesses. This will help you to begin developing an honest and realistic conception of yourself.

2. Set realistic expectations.

It’s important to set small, reachable goals that are within your power. For example, setting an extremely high expectation or an expectation that someone else will change their behavior is virtually guaranteed to make you feel like a failure, through no fault of your own.

3. Stop being a perfectionist.

Acknowledge both your accomplishments and mistakes. Nobody is perfect, and trying to be will only lead to disappointment. Acknowledging your accomplishments and recognizing your mistakes is the way to keep a positive outlook while learning and growing from your mistakes.

4. Explore yourself.

The importance of knowing yourself and being at peace with who you are cannot be overstated. This can take some trial and error, and you will constantly learn new things about yourself, but it is a journey that should be undertaken with purpose and zeal.

5. Be willing to adjust your self-image.

We all change as we age and grow, and we must keep up with our ever-changing selves if we want to set and achieve meaningful goals.

6. Stop comparing yourself to others.

Comparing ourselves to others is a trap that is extremely easy to fall into, especially today with social media and the ability to project a polished, perfected appearance. The only person you should compare yourself to is you (Grohol, 2011).

The Positivity Blog also offers some helpful tips on enhancing your self-esteem, including:

• Say “stop” to your inner critic.
• Use healthier motivation habits.
• Take a 2-minute self-appreciation break.
• Write down 3 things in the evening that you can appreciate about yourself.
• Do the right thing.
• Replace the perfectionism.
• Handle mistakes and failures in a more positive way.
• Be kinder towards other people .
• Try something new.
• Stop falling into the comparison trap.
• Spend more time with supportive people (and less time with destructive people).
• Remember the “whys” of high self-esteem (Edberg, 2017).

Another list of specific, practical things you can do to develop and maintain a good sense of self-esteem comes from the Entrepreneur website:

• Use distancing pronouns. When you are experiencing stress or negative self-talk, try putting it in more distant terms (e.g., instead of saying “I am feeling ashamed,” try saying “Courtney is feeling ashamed.”). This can help you to see the situation as a challenge rather than a threat.
• Remind yourself of your achievements. The best way to overcome imposter syndrome—the belief that, despite all of your accomplishments, you are a failure and a fraud—is to list all of your personal successes. You might be able to explain a couple of them away as a chance, but they can’t all be due to luck!
• Move more! This can be as simple as a short walk or as intense as a several-mile run, as quick as striking a “power pose” or as long as a two-hour yoga session; it doesn’t matter exactly what you do, just that you get more in touch with your body and improve both your health and your confidence.
• Use the “five-second” rule. No, not the one about food that is dropped on the ground! This five-second rule is about following up good thoughts and inspiring ideas with action. Do something to make that great idea happen within five seconds.
• Practice visualizing your success. Close your eyes and take a few minutes to imagine the scenario in which you have reached your goals, using all five senses and paying attention to the details.
• Be prepared—for whatever situation you are about to encounter. If you are going into a job interview, make sure you have practiced, know about the company, and have some good questions ready to ask. If you are going on a date, take some time to boost your confidence, dress well, and have a plan A and a plan B (and maybe even a plan C!) to make sure it goes well.
• Limit your usage of social media. Spend less time looking at a screen and more time experiencing the world around you.
• Meditate. Establish a regular meditation practice to inspect your thoughts, observe them, and separate yourself from them. Cultivating a sense of inner peace will go a long way towards developing healthy self-esteem.
• Keep your goals a secret. You don’t need to keep all of your hopes and dreams to yourself, but make sure you save some of your goal striving and success for just you—it can make you more likely to meet them and also more satisfied when you do.
• Practice affirmations (like the ones listed later in this piece). Make time to regularly say positive things about yourself and situations in which you often feel uncertain.
• Build your confidence through failure. Use failure as an opportunity to learn and grow, and seek out failure by trying new things and taking calculated risks (Laurinavicius, 2017).

Now that we have a good idea of how to improve self-esteem , there is an important caveat to the topic: many of the characteristics and factors that we believe result from self-esteem may also influence one’s sense of self-esteem, and vice versa.

For example, although we recommend improving self-esteem to positively impact grades or work performance, success in these areas is at least somewhat dependent on self-esteem as well.

Similarly, those who have a healthy level of self-esteem are more likely to have positive relationships, but those with positive relationships are also more likely to have healthy self-esteem, likely because the relationship works in both directions.

While there is nothing wrong with boosting your self-esteem, keep in mind that in some cases you may be putting the cart before the horse, and commit to developing yourself in several areas rather than just working on enhancing your self-esteem.

Based on research like that described above, we have learned that there are many ways therapy and counseling can help clients to improve their self-esteem.

If done correctly, therapy can be an excellent method of enhancing self-esteem, especially if it’s low to begin with.

Here are some of the ways therapy and counseling can a client’s boost self-esteem:

• When a client shares their inner thoughts and feelings with the therapist, and the therapist responds with acceptance and compassion rather than judgment or correction, this can build the foundations of healthy self-esteem for the client.
• This continued acceptance and unconditional positive regard encourage the client to re-think some of their assumptions, and come to the conclusion that “Maybe there’s nothing wrong with me after all!”
• The therapist can explain that self-esteem is a belief rather than a fact and that beliefs are based on our experiences; this can help the client understand that he could be exactly the same person as he is right now and have high self-esteem instead of low, if he had different experiences that cultivated a sense of high self-esteem instead of low self-esteem.
• The therapist can offer the client new experiences upon which to base this new belief about herself, experiences in which the client is “basically acceptable” instead of “basically wrong.” The therapist’s acceptance of the client can act as a model for the client of how she can accept herself.
• Most importantly, the therapist can accept the client for who he is and affirm his thoughts and feelings as acceptable rather than criticizing him for them. The therapist does not need to approve of each and every action taken by the client, but showing acceptance and approval of who he is at the deepest level will have an extremely positive impact on his own belief in his worth and value as a person (Gilbertson, 2016).

Following these guidelines will encourage your client to develop a better sense of self-love , self-worth, self-acceptance , and self-esteem, as well as discouraging “needless shame” and learning how to separate herself from her behavior (Gilbertson, 2016).

One of these methods is meditation—yes, you can add yet another benefit of meditation to the list! However, not only can we develop self-esteem through meditation , we also gain some other important benefits.

When we meditate, we cultivate our ability to let go and to keep our thoughts and feelings in perspective. We learn to simply observe instead of actively participate in every little experience that pops into our head. In other words, we are “loosening the grip we have on our sense of self” (Puddicombe, 2015).

While this may sound counterintuitive to developing and maintaining a positive sense of self, it is actually a great way to approach it. Through meditation, we gain the ability to become aware of our inner experiences without over-identifying with them, letting our thoughts pass by without judgment or a strong emotional response.

As meditation expert Andy Puddicombe notes, low self-esteem can be understood as the result of over-identification with the self. When we get overly wrapped up in our sense of self, whether that occurs with a focus on the positive (I’m the BEST) or the negative (I’m the WORST), we place too much importance on it. We may even get obsessive about the self, going over every little word, thought, or feeling that enters our mind.

A regular meditation practice can boost your self-esteem by helping you to let go of your preoccupation with your self, freeing you from being controlled by the thoughts and feelings your self-experiences.

When you have the ability to step back and observe a disturbing or self-deprecating thought, it suddenly doesn’t have as much power over you as it used to; this deidentification with the negative thoughts you have about yourself results in less negative talk over time and freedom from your overly critical inner voice (Puddicombe, 2015).

Self-esteem is the topic of many a psychological scale and assessment, and many of them are valid, reliable, and very popular among researchers; however, these assessments are not perfect. There are a few problems and considerations you should take into account if you want to measure self-esteem, including:

• Lack of consensus on the definition (Demo, 1985).
• Overall gender differences in self-esteem (Bingham, 1983).
• Too many instruments for assessing self-esteem, and low correlations between them (Demo, 1985).
• The unexplained variance between self-reports and inferred measures such as ratings by others (Demo, 1985).

Although these issues are certainly not unique to the measurement of self-esteem, one should approach the assessment of self-esteem with multiple measurement methods in hand, with the appropriate level of caution, or both.

Still, even though there are various issues with the measurement of self-esteem, avoiding the measurement is not an option! If you are looking to measure self-esteem and worried about finding a validated scale, look no further than one of the foundations of self-esteem research: Rosenberg’s scale.

Measuring Self-Esteem with the Rosenberg Scale

The most common scale of self-esteem is Rosenberg’s Self-Esteem Scale (also called the RSE and sometimes the SES). This scale was developed by Rosenberg and presented in his 1965 book Society and the Adolescent Self-Image.

It contains 10 items rated on a scale from 1 (strongly agree) to 4 (strongly disagree). Some of the items are reverse-scored, and the total score can be calculated by summing up the total points for an overall measure of self-esteem (although it can also be scored in a different, more complex manner—see page 61 of this PDF for instructions).

The 10 items are:

1. On the whole, I am satisfied with myself. 2. At times I think I am no good at all. 3. I feel that I have a number of good qualities. 4. I am able to do things as well as most other people. 5. I feel I do not have much to be proud of. 6. I certainly feel useless at times. 7. I feel that I’m a person of worth. 8. I wish I could have more respect for myself. 9. All in all, I am inclined to think that I am a failure. 10. I take a positive attitude toward myself.

As you likely figured out already, items 2, 5, 6, 8, and 9 are reverse-scored, while the other items are scored normally. This creates a single score of between 10 and 40 points, with lower scores indicating higher self-esteem. Put another way, higher scores indicate a strong sense of low self-esteem.

The scale is considered highly consistent and reliable, and scores correlate highly with other measures of self-esteem and negatively with measures of depression and anxiety. It has been used by thousands of researchers throughout the years and is still in use today, making it one of the most-cited scales ever developed.

The Coopersmith Self-Esteem Inventory (1967/1981)

The second most commonly used reliable and valid measure for self-esteem is The Coopersmith Self-Esteem Inventory. Within this test, 50 items are included to measure the test-takes attitudes towards themselves, by responding to statements with the selection of “like me” or “not like me” (Robinson, Shaver & Wrightsman, 2010).

Initially created to test the self-esteem of children, it was later altered by Ryden (1978) and now two separate versions exist; one for children and one for adults.

Find out more about taking this test here .

It might be quicker to list what factors don’t influence self-esteem than to identify which factors do influence it! As you might expect, self-esteem is a complex construct and there are many factors that contribute to it, whether positively or negatively.

For a quick sample of some of the many factors that are known to influence self-esteem, check out this list:

• Commitment to the worker, spouse, and parental role are positively linked to self-esteem (Reitzes & Mutran, 1994).
• Worker identity meaning is positively related to self-esteem (Reitzes & Mutran, 2006).
• Being married and older is linked to lower self-esteem (Reitzes & Mutran, 2006).
• Higher education and higher income are related to higher self-esteem (Reitzes & Mutran, 2006).
• Low socioeconomic status and low self-esteem are related (von Soest, Wagner, Hansen, & Gerstorf, 2018).
• Living alone (without a significant other) is linked to low self-esteem (van Soest et al., 2018).
• Unemployment and disability contribute to lower self-esteem (van Soest et al., 2018).
• A more mature personality and emotional stability are linked to higher self-esteem (van Soest et al., 2018).
• Social norms (the importance of friends’ and family members’ opinions) about one’s body and exercise habits are negatively linked to self-esteem, while exercise self-efficacy and self-fulfillment are positively linked to self-esteem (Chang & Suttikun, 2017).

If you’re thinking that an important technological factor is missing, go on to the next section and see if you’re right!

Although you may have found some of the findings on self-esteem covered earlier surprising, you will most likely expect this one: studies suggest that social media usage negatively impacts self-esteem (Friedlander, 2016).

This effect is easy to understand. Humans are social creatures and need interaction with others to stay healthy and happy; however, we also use those around us as comparisons to measure and track our own progress in work, relationships, and life in general. Social media makes these comparisons easier than ever, but they give this tendency to compare a dark twist.

What we see on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter is not representative of real life. It is often carefully curated and painstakingly presented to give the best possible impression.

We rarely see the sadness, the failure, and the disappointment that accompanies everyday human life; instead, we see a perfect picture, a timeline full of only good news, and short blurbs about achievements, accomplishments, and happiness .

Although this social comparison with unattainable standards is clearly a bad habit to get into, social media is not necessarily a death knell for your self-esteem. Moderate social media usage complemented by frequent self-reminders that we are often only seeing the very best in others can allow us to use social media posts as inspiration and motivation rather than unhealthy comparison.

You don’t need to give up social media for good in order to maintain a healthy sense of self-esteem—just use it mindfully and keep it in the right perspective!

By viewing self-esteem as a muscle to grow we establish a world of new opportunities. No longer do we have to view ourselves in the same light.

Use these 10 tips to strengthen the attitudes towards yourself:

1. Spend time with people who lift you up 2. Giveback by helping others 3. Celebrate your achievements, no matter the size 4. Do what makes you happy 5. Change what you can – and let go of what you can’t 6. Let go of perfectionism ideals 7. Speak to yourself like a friend 8. Get involved in extra-curricula’s 9. Own your uniqueness 10. Create a positive self-dialogue.

Influential American author, Jack Canfield explains “Daily affirmations are to the mind what exercise is to the body.” (watch this YouTube clip).

Affirmations are a great way to boost your self-esteem and, in turn, your overall wellbeing. There are tons of examples of affirmations you can use for this purpose, including these 17 from Develop Good Habits :

• Mistakes are a stepping stone to success. They are the path I must tread to achieve my dreams.
• I will continue to learn and grow.
• Mistakes are just an apprenticeship to achievement.
• I deserve to be happy and successful.
• I deserve a good life. I deny any need for suffering and misery.
• I am competent, smart, and able.
• I am growing and changing for the better.
• I love the person I am becoming.
• I believe in my skills and abilities.
• I have great ideas. I make useful contributions.
• I acknowledge my own self-worth; my self-confidence is rising.
• I am worthy of all the good things that happen in my life.
• I am confident with my life plan and the way things are going.
• I deserve the love I am given.
• I let go of the negative feelings about myself and accept all that is good.
• I will stand by my decisions. They are sound and reasoned.
• I have, or can quickly get, all the knowledge I need to succeed.

If none of these leap out and inspire you, you can always create your own! Just keep in mind these three simple rules for creating effective affirmations:

• The affirmations should be in the present tense. They must affirm your value and worth right here, right now (e.g., not “I will do better tomorrow” but “I am doing great today.”).
• The affirmations should be positively worded. They should not deny or reject anything (i.e., “I am not a loser.”), but make a firm statement (e.g., “I am a worthy person.”).
• The affirmations should make you feel good and put you in a positive light. They should not be empty words and they should be relevant to your life (e.g., “I am a world-class skier” is relevant if you ski, but is not a good affirmation if you don’t ski.).

Use these three rules to put together some positive, uplifting, and encouraging affirmations that you can repeat as often as needed—but aim for at least once a day.

There are many, many books available on self-esteem: what it is, what influences it, how it can be developed, and how it can be encouraged in others (particularly children). Here is just a sample of some of the most popular and well-received books on self-esteem :

• Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving, and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem by Matthew McKay, PhD ( Amazon )
• The Self-Esteem Guided Journal by Matthew McKay & C. Sutker ( Amazon )
• Ten Days to Self-Esteem by David D. Burns, MD ( Amazon )
• The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field by Nathanial Branden (if you’re not a big reader, check out the animated book review video below) ( Amazon )
• The Self-Esteem Workbook by Glenn R. Schiraldi, PhD ( Amazon )
• The Self-Esteem Workbook for Teens: Activities to Help You Build Confidence and Achieve Your Goals by Lisa M. Schab, LCSW ( Amazon )
• Believing in Myself by E Larsen & C Hegarty. ( Amazon )
• Being Me: A Kid’s Guide to Boosting Confidence and Self-Esteem by Wendy L. Moss, PhD ( Amazon )
• Healing Your Emotional Self: A Powerful Program to Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem, Quiet Your Inner Critic, and Overcome Your Shame by Beverly Engel ( Amazon )

Plus, here’s a bonus—a free PDF version of Nathaniel Branden’s The Psychology of Self-Esteem: A Revolutionary Approach to Self-Understanding That Launched a New Era in Modern Psychology .

If reading is not a preferred method of learning more, fear not! There are some great YouTube videos and TED Talks on self-esteem. A few of the most popular and most impactful are included here.

Why Thinking You’re Ugly is Bad for You by Meaghan Ramsey

This TED talk is all about the importance of self-esteem and the impact of negative self-esteem, especially on young people and girls. Ramsey notes that low self-esteem impacts physical as well as mental health, the work we do, and our overall finances as we chase the perfect body, the perfect face, or the perfect hair. She ends by outlining the six areas addressed by effective self-esteem programs:

• The influence of family, friends, and relationships
• The media and celebrity culture
• How to handle teasing and bullying
• The way we compete and compare ourselves with others
• The way we talk about appearance
• The foundations of respecting and caring for yourself

Meet Yourself: A User’s Guide to Building Self-Esteem by Niko Everett

Another great TEDx Talk comes from the founder of the Girls for Change organization, Niko Everett. In this talk, she goes over the power of self-knowledge, self-acceptance, and self-love. She highlights the importance of the thoughts we have about ourselves and the impact they have on our self-esteem and shares some techniques to help both children and adults enhance their self-esteem.

Self-Esteem – Understanding & Fixing Low Self-Esteem by Actualized.org

This video from Leo Gura at Actualized.org defines self-esteem, describes the elements of self-esteem, and the factors that influence self-esteem. He shares why self-esteem is important and how it can be developed and enhanced.

How to Build Self Esteem – The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden Animated Book Review by FightMediocrity

This quick, 6-minute video on self-esteem outlines what author Nathaniel Branden sees as the “Six Pillars” of self-esteem:

• The practice of living consciously Be aware of your daily activities and relationship with others, insecure reflections, and also personal priorities.
• The practice of self-acceptance This includes becoming aware and accepting the best and the worst parts of you and also the disowned parts of ourselves.
• The practice of self-responsibility This implies realizing that you are responsible for your choices and actions.
• The practice of self-assertiveness Act through your real convictions and feelings as much as possible.
• The practice of living purposefully Achieve personal goals that energize your existence.
• The practice of personal integrity Don’t compensate your ideals, beliefs, and behaviors for a result that leads to incongruence. When your behaviors are congruent with your ideals, integrity will appear.

The speaker provides a definition and example of each of the six pillars and finishes the video by emphasizing the first two words of each pillar: “The Practice.” These words highlight that the effort applied to building self-esteem is, in fact, the most important factor in developing self-esteem.

Sometimes all you need to get to work on bettering yourself is an inspirational quote. The value of quotes is subjective, so these may not all resonate with you, but hopefully, you will find that at least one or two lights that spark within you!

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”

Sharon Salzberg

“The greatest thing in the world is to know how to belong to oneself.”

Michel de Montaigne

“The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone.”

“Dare to love yourself as if you were a rainbow with gold at both ends.”

“As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are—what others say is irrelevant.”

“I don’t want everyone to like me; I should think less of myself if some people did.”

Henry James

“Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.”

Louise L. Hay

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”

Marianne Williamson

“I don’t entirely approve of some of the things I have done, or am, or have been. But I’m me. God knows, I’m me.”

“To me, self-esteem is not self-love. It is self-acknowledgement, as in recognizing and accepting who you are.”

Amity Gaige

“Self-esteem is as important to our well-being as legs are to a table. It is essential for physical and mental health and for happiness.”

Louise Hart

“Self-esteem is made up primarily of two things: feeling lovable and feeling capable. Lovable means I feel people want to be with me. They invite me to parties; they affirm I have the qualities necessary to be included. Feeling capable is knowing that I can produce a result. It’s knowing I can handle anything that life hands me.”

Jack Canfield

“You can’t let someone else lower your self-esteem, because that’s what it is—self-esteem. You need to first love yourself before you have anybody else love you.”

Winnie Harlow

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

“Our self-respect tracks our choices. Every time we act in harmony with our authentic self and our heart, we earn our respect. It is that simple. Every choice matters.” Dan Coppersmith

17 Exercises To Foster Self-Acceptance and Compassion

Help your clients develop a kinder, more accepting relationship with themselves using these 17 Self-Compassion Exercises [PDF] that promote self-care and self-compassion.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

We hope you enjoyed this opportunity to learn about self-esteem! If you take only one important lesson away from this piece, make sure it’s this one: you absolutely can build your own self-esteem, and you can have a big impact on the self-esteem of those you love.

Self-esteem is not a panacea—it will not fix all of your problems or help you sail smoothly through a life free of struggle and suffering—but it will help you find the courage to try new things, build the resilience to bounce back from failure, and make you more susceptible to success.

It is something we have to continually work towards, but it’s absolutely achievable.

Stay committed.

Keep aware of your internal thoughts and external surroundings. Keep focused on your personal goals and all that is possible when self-doubt isn’t holding you back.

What are your thoughts on self-esteem in psychology? Should we be encouraging it more? Less? Is there an “ideal amount” of self-esteem? We’d love to hear from you! Leave your thoughts in the comments below.

You can read more about self-esteem worksheets and exercises for adults and teens here .

Thanks for reading!

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Self Compassion Exercises for free .

• Adler, N., & Stewart, J. (2004). Self-esteem. Psychosocial Working Group. Retrieved from http://www.macses.ucsf.edu/research/psychosocial/selfesteem.php
• Allegiance Health. (2015). 8 Health benefits of a healthy self-esteem. Health & Wellness Blog. Retrieved from https://www.allegiancehealth.org/blog/women/8-health-benefits-healthy-self-esteem
• Bastianello, M., Pacico, J., & Hutz, C. (2014). Optimism, self-esteem and personality: Adaptation and validation of the Brazilian Version Of The Revised Life Orientation Test (LOT-R). Psico-USF, Bragança Paulista . Retrieved from http://www.scielo.br/pdf/pusf/v19n3/15.pdf
• Branden, N. (1992). The power of self-esteem. Deerfield Beach, FL: Health Communications.
• Branden, N. (2013). What self-esteem is and is not. Retrieved from http://www.nathanielbranden.com/what-self-esteem-is-and-is-not.
• Bingham, W. C. (1983). Problems in the assessment of self-esteem. International Journal for the Advancement of Counselling, 6, 17-22.
• Brockner, J. 1984. Low self-esteem and behavioral plasticity: Some implications for personality and social psychology. In L. Wheeler (Ed.),  Review of Personality and Social Psychology, 37 : 1732–1741.
• Burton, N. (2015). Self-confidence versus self-esteem. Psychology Today . Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hide-and-seek/201510/self-confidence-versus-self-esteem
• Chang, H. J., & Suttikun, C. (2017). The examination of psychological factors and social norms affecting body satisfaction and self-esteem for college students. Family and Consumer Sciences Research Journal, 45 (4) , 422-437 .
• Chen, S. X., Cheung, F. M., Bond, M. H., & Leung, J. (2006). Going beyond self-esteem to predict life satisfaction: The Chinese case. Asian Journal of Social Psychology, 9, 24-35.
• Confidence Coalition. (n.d.). Join KD in the movement to build confidence in girls and women. Kappa Delta Sorority. Retrieved from https://kappadelta.org/initiatives/confidence-coalition/
• Council on Alcoholism and Drug Abuse. (n.d.). Image and self-esteem. Mentor Resource Center. Retrieved from http://mentor-center.org/image-and-self-esteem/.
• Crocker, J., & Park, L. E. (2003). Seeking self-esteem: Construction, maintenance, and protection of self-worth .
• Davis, W., Gfeller, K., & Thaut, M. (2008). An introduction to music therapy. Silver Spring, MD: American Music Therapy Association.
• Demo, D. H. (1985). The measurement of self-esteem: Refining our methods. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 48, 1490-1502.
• Diener, E. & Diener, M. (1995). Cross-cultural correlates of life satisfaction and self-esteem. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 68 , 653–663.
• Dumont, M. & Provost, M. A,. (1999). Resilience in adolescents: Protective role of social support, coping strategies, self-esteem, and social activities on experience of stress and depression. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 28,  343-363.
• Dove Self-Esteem Fund. (2008). Real girls, real pressure: A national report on the state of self-esteem. Dove. Retrieved from http://www.isacs.org/misc_files/SelfEsteem_Report%20-%20Dove%20Campaign%20for%20Real%20Beauty.pdf
• Edberg, H. (2013). How to improve your self-esteem: 12 Powerful tips. The Positivity Blog. Retrieved from https://www.positivityblog.com/improve-self-esteem/
• Ellis, A. (1994). Reason and emotion in psychotherapy . Birch Lane Press.
• Ellis, A. (1976). RET abolishes most of the human ego.  Psychotherapy: Theory, research & practice, 13(4) , 343.
• Friedlander, J. (2016). Why social media is ruining your self-esteem—and how to stop it. Success. Retrieved from https://www.success.com/article/why-social-media-is-ruining-your-self-esteem-and-how-to-stop-it
• Gilbertson, T. (2016). Does therapy for low self-esteem really work? Good Therapy. Retrieved from https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/does-therapy-for-low-self-esteem-really-work-0520164
• Grogan, S. (1999). Body image: Understanding body dissatisfaction in men, women and children . London, UK: Routledge.
• Grohol, J. M. (2011). 6 Tips to improve your self-esteem. Psych Central. Retrieved from https://psychcentral.com/blog/6-tips-to-improve-your-self-esteem/
• Hibbert, C. (2013). Self-esteem vs. self-worth: Q & A with Dr. Christina Hibbert. Retrieved from http://www.drchristinahibbert.com/self-esteem-vs-self-worth/
• Karatas, Z., & Cakar, F. S. (2011). Self-esteem and hopelessness, and resiliency: An exploratory study of adolescents in Turkey. International Education Studies , 4 (4), 84-91.
• Kernis, M. H., & Lakey, C. E. (2010).  Fragile versus secure high self-esteem: Implications for defensiveness and insecurity . Psychology Press.
• King, K. A., Vidourek, R. A., Davis, B., & McClellan, W. (2009). Increasing self-esteem and school connectedness through a multidimensional mentoring program. Journal of School Health, 72 , 294-299.
• Laurinavicius, T. (2017). 11 Research-backed hacks to improve self-confidence. Entrepreneur. Retrieved from https://www.entrepreneur.com/slideshow/302265.
• MacInnes, D. L. (2006). Self‐esteem and self‐acceptance: an examination into their relationship and their effect on psychological health. Journal of Psychiatric and Mental Health Nursing, 13(5) , 483-489.
• Maslow, A. H. (1943). A theory of human motivation. Psychological Review, 50(4) , 370-396.
• McLeod, S. (2008). Self concept. Simply Psychology. Retrieved from https://www.simplypsychology.org/self-concept.html.
• McLeod, S. (2017). Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Simply Psychology. Retrieved from https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html.
• Myers, D. G., & Diener, E. (1995). Who is happy?.  Psychological science, 6(1) , 10-19.
• Misetich, M., & Delis-Abrams, A. (2003). Your self esteem is up to YOU. Self-Growth. Retrieved from http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Abrams1.html.
• Neff, K. (n.d.). Why self-compassion is healthier than self-esteem. Self-Compassion.org. Retrieved from http://self-compassion.org/why-self-compassion-is-healthier-than-self-esteem/
• Neill, J. (2005). Definitions of various self constructs. Wilderdom. Retrieved from http://www.wilderdom.com/self/.
• Orth, U. (2018). The family environment in early childhood has a long-term effect on self-esteem: A longitudinal study from birth to age 27 years. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 114, 637-655.
• Park, K. M., & Park, H. (2014). Effects of self-esteem improvement program on self-esteem and peer attachment in elementary school children with observed problematic behaviors. Asian Nursing Research, 9, 53-59.
• Purkey, W. (1988). An overview of self-concept theory for counselors. ERIC Clearinghouse on Counseling and Personnel Services. Ann Arbor: MI (An ERIC/CAPS Digest: ED304630).
• Reitzes, D. C., & Mutran, E. J. (1994). Multiple roles and identities: Factors influencing self-esteem among middle-aged working men and women. Social Psychology Quarterly, 57, 313-325.
• Reitzes, D. C., & Mutran, E. J. (2006). Self and health: Factors that encourage self-esteem and functional health. The Journals of Gerontology Series B: Psychological Sciences and Social Sciences , 61 (1), S44-S51.
• Robinson, J., Shaver, P., & Wrightsman, L. (2010). Measures of personality and social psychological attitudes. San Diego, CA: Academic Press.
• Rosenberg, M. (1965). Society and the adolescent self-image . Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press.
• Self Esteem Awareness. (n.d.). 1 0 Positive self esteem examples. Retrieved from https://www.selfesteemawareness.com/10-positive-self-esteem-examples/
• Seligman, M. (2006). Learned optimism: How to change your mind and your life. New York, NY: Vintage Books.
• Smith, S. R., & Harte, V. (n.d.). 10 Characteristics of people with high self-esteem. Dummies. Retrieved from http://www.dummies.com/health/mental-health/self-esteem/10-characteristics-of-people-with-high-self-esteem/
• Spencer, J., Zimet, G., Aalsma, M., & Orr, D. (2002). Self-esteem as a predictor of initiation of coitus in early adolescents. Pediatrics, 109, 581-584.
• Von Soest, T., Wagner, J., Hansen, T., & Gerstorf, D. (2018). Self-esteem across the second half of life: The role of socioeconomic status, physical health, social relationships, and personality factors. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 114, 945-958.

Share this article:

Article feedback

What our readers think.

Interesting, and clear and quite precise in this definitions…..definitions are the most important.

Extremely good article addressing the prevalence of low self-esteem in Western society and how to overcome it. But did it consider the possibility self-esteem could ever be too high? I am still influenced by my old-school upbringing, where being labeled as “conceited” was a a thing. I was told that’s only an attempt to compensate for low self esteem, along with “egomania” and other disorders, but perhaps related to the driven personalities that have influenced much of history.

Excellent, Elaborative, Enduring and Eloquent ESSAY 🙂 Loved this article, very clear, very informative, very useful and practically implementable if determined to improve the quality of one’s life. THANK YOU is a small word for the author of this article.

thak you for this good article

Very helpful. Thank you very much

Thanks for sharing it. I’m happy after reading it , please keep continue to enlighten people

Let us know your thoughts Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published.

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

Related articles

Social Identity Theory: I, You, Us & We. Why Groups Matter

As humans, we spend most of our life working to understand our personal identities. The question of “who am I?” is an age-old philosophical thought [...]

Discovering Self-Empowerment: 13 Methods to Foster It

In a world where external circumstances often dictate our sense of control and agency, the concept of self-empowerment emerges as a beacon of hope and [...]

How to Improve Your Client’s Self-Esteem in Therapy: 7 Tips

When children first master the expectations set by their parents, the experience provides them with a source of pride and self-esteem. As children get older, [...]

Read other articles by their category

• Body & Brain (50)
• Coaching & Application (57)
• Compassion (26)
• Counseling (51)
• Emotional Intelligence (24)
• Gratitude (18)
• Grief & Bereavement (21)
• Happiness & SWB (40)
• Meaning & Values (26)
• Meditation (20)
• Mindfulness (45)
• Motivation & Goals (45)
• Optimism & Mindset (34)
• Positive CBT (29)
• Positive Communication (20)
• Positive Education (47)
• Positive Emotions (33)
• Positive Leadership (18)
• Positive Parenting (4)
• Positive Psychology (33)
• Positive Workplace (37)
• Productivity (17)
• Relationships (46)
• Resilience & Coping (38)
• Self Awareness (21)
• Self Esteem (38)
• Strengths & Virtues (32)
• Stress & Burnout Prevention (34)
• Theory & Books (46)
• Therapy Exercises (37)
• Types of Therapy (64)

3 Self-Compassion Tools (PDF)

Self-Concept in Psychology: Definition & Examples

Saul Mcleod, PhD

Editor-in-Chief for Simply Psychology

BSc (Hons) Psychology, MRes, PhD, University of Manchester

Saul Mcleod, PhD., is a qualified psychology teacher with over 18 years of experience in further and higher education. He has been published in peer-reviewed journals, including the Journal of Clinical Psychology.

Learn about our Editorial Process

Olivia Guy-Evans, MSc

Associate Editor for Simply Psychology

BSc (Hons) Psychology, MSc Psychology of Education

Olivia Guy-Evans is a writer and associate editor for Simply Psychology. She has previously worked in healthcare and educational sectors.

On This Page:

The self-concept is a general term for how someone thinks about, evaluates, or perceives themselves. To be aware of oneself is to have a concept of oneself.

It’s formed through experiences, interactions, and reflections, and plays a pivotal role in influencing behavior, emotions, and interpersonal relationships. A healthy self-concept promotes well-being, while a negative one can lead to emotional and social challenges.

Baumeister (1999) provides the following self-concept definition: “The individual’s belief about himself or herself, including the person’s attributes and who and what the self is.”

The self-concept is an important term for both social and humanistic psychology . Lewis (1990) suggests that the development of a concept of self has two aspects:

(1) The Existential Self

This is “the most basic part of the self-scheme or self-concept; the sense of being separate and distinct from others and the awareness of the constancy of the self” (Bee, 1992).

The existential self is a concept within developmental psychology, particularly in the study of infant development. It refers to the basic and most fundamental understanding that an individual exists as a separate and distinct entity from others.

This realization typically begins in infancy, as early as a few months old, when a baby recognizes its existence apart from the external world.

The child realizes that they exist as a separate entity from others and continue to exist over time and space.

The existential self is the foundation upon which more complex aspects of self-concept, like the categorical self (understanding oneself in terms of categorical memberships like gender, skills, and age), are built.

According to Lewis (1990), awareness of the existential self begins as young as two to three months old and arises in part due to the child’s relationship with the world. For example, the child smiles, and someone smiles back, or the child touches a mobile and sees it move.

(2) The Categorical Self

Having realized that he or she exists as a separate experiencing being, the child becomes aware that he or she is also an object in the world.

The categorical self involves the understanding that one can be categorized into various groups based on traits, roles, and attributes.

Just as other objects, including people, have properties that can be experienced (big, small, red, smooth, and so on), so the child is becoming aware of himself or herself as an object which can be experienced and which has properties.

The self, too, can be put into categories such as age, gender, size, or skill. Two of the first categories to be applied are age (“I am 3”) and gender (“I am a girl”).

In early childhood, the categories children apply to themselves are very concrete (e.g., hair color, height, and favorite things). Later, self-description also begins to include reference to internal psychological traits, comparative evaluations, and how others see them.

For instance, a child might identify as being a “big boy” or “big girl,” differentiate themselves by saying they have “brown hair,” or later recognize they are “good at drawing.” The categorical self lays the foundation for more intricate self-identifications as one matures.

Self-image refers to the mental representation or picture that individuals have of themselves, encompassing both physical appearance and personal traits.

It’s how people perceive themselves and believe others perceive them. Personal experiences, interactions with others, societal standards, and media influences, can shape this perception.

This does not necessarily have to reflect reality. Indeed, a person with anorexia who is thin may have a self-image in which the person believes they are fat.

A person’s self-image is affected by many factors, such as parental influences, friends, the media, etc.

Self-image is a significant component of one’s overall self-concept and is crucial to self-esteem and confidence. It can influence behavior, choices, relationships, and overall mental well-being. Over time, a person’s self-image can change based on experiences, feedback, achievements, and personal reflections.

The Twenty Statements Test

Kuhn (1960) investigated the self-image by using The Twenty Statements Test .

He asked people to answer “Who am I?” in 20 different ways.

He found that the responses could be divided into two major groups. These were social roles (external or objective aspects of oneself such as son, teacher, friend) and personality traits (internal or affective aspects of oneself such as gregarious, impatient, humorous).

The list of answers to the question “Who Am I?” probably includes examples of each of the following four types of responses:

• Physical Description : I’m tall, have blue eyes…etc.
• Social Roles : We are all social beings whose behavior is shaped to some extent by the roles we play. Such roles as student, housewife, or member of the football team not only help others to recognize us but also help us to know what is expected of us in various situations.
• Personal Traits : These are the third dimension of our self-descriptions. “I’m impulsive…I’m generous…I tend to worry a lot,”…etc.
• Existential Statements (abstract ones): These can range from “I’m a child of the universe” to “I’m a human being” to “I’m a spiritual being, “…etc.

Typically, young people describe themselves more in terms of personal traits, whereas older people feel defined to a greater extent by their social roles.

Actual Self

The actual self is how individuals currently see themselves based on their self-awareness and introspection. It represents the attributes, roles, competencies, and characteristics that a person believes they genuinely possess at the present moment.

While “actual self” and “self-image” are closely related and often used interchangeably in casual discussions, they are distinct concepts within the realm of psychology. Here’s a breakdown of the differences:

• Represents an individual’s current perception of themselves based on attributes, roles, and abilities they believe they genuinely possess.
• Serves as a baseline for comparison with other self-representations, like the ideal self or ought self.
• Refers to the mental representation or picture an individual has of themselves.
• It encompasses both physical appearance and perceived personal traits.
• Self-image is about how people perceive themselves and how they believe they are seen by others.

In essence, the “actual self” is a broader construct that might include one’s self-image as a component.

The actual self covers the entirety of an individual’s current self-perception, while the self-image focuses more on the visual or representational aspect and perceived traits.

Both, however, are integral parts of an individual’s overall self-concept.

Self-Esteem

Self-esteem (also known as self-worth) refers to the extent to which we like, accept, or approve of ourselves or how much we value ourselves.

Self-esteem always involves a degree of evaluation, and we may have either a positive or a negative view of ourselves.

Factors influencing self-esteem include:

• Childhood experiences
• Feedback from others
• Comparisons with peers
• Societal standards and cultural influences
• Personal achievements or failures

High Self-Esteem : Individuals with high self-esteem generally believe that they have good qualities and value themselves positively. They often handle life challenges better, are more resilient, and have a positive outlook on life.

• Confidence in our own abilities
• Self-acceptance
• Not worrying about what others think

Low Self-Esteem: Those with low self-esteem tend to view themselves negatively, doubt their abilities, and are more critical of themselves. They are more susceptible to experiencing feelings of worthlessness, depression, and anxiety.

• Lack of confidence
• Want to be/look like someone else
• Always worrying about what others might think

Having a balanced self-esteem is crucial for mental well-being. While high self-esteem is generally beneficial, overly inflated self-esteem can lead to narcissism . On the other hand, chronically low self-esteem can contribute to a host of psychological issues, including depression and anxiety.

Measurement

There are several ways of measuring self-esteem. For example, Harrill Self-Esteem Inventory is a questionnaire comprising 15 statements about a range of interests.

Another example is the Thematic Apperception Test (TAT), which is a neutral cartoon given to the participant, who then has to devise a story about what’s going on.

Argyle (2008) believes 4 major factors influence self-esteem.

1. The Reaction of Others

If people admire us, flatter us, seek out our company, listen attentively and agree with us, we tend to develop a positive self-image.

If they avoid, neglect, and tell us things about ourselves that we don’t want to hear, we develop a negative self-image.

2. Comparison with Others

If the people we compare ourselves with (our reference group) appear to be more successful, happier, richer, and better looking than ourselves, we tend to develop a negative self-image, BUT if they are less successful than us, our image will be positive.

3. Social Roles

Some social roles carry prestige, e.g., doctor, airline pilot, TV presenter, and premiership footballer, and this promotes self-esteem.

Other roles carry a stigma. E.g., a prisoner, mental hospital patient, refuse collector, or unemployed person.

4. Identification

Roles aren’t just “out there.” They also become part of our personality, i.e., we identify with the positions we occupy, the roles we play, and the groups we belong to.

But just as important as all these factors are the influence of our parents! (See Coopersmith’s research.)

Experiments

Morse and Gergen (1970) showed that our self-esteem might change rapidly in uncertain or anxiety-arousing situations.

Participants were waiting for a job interview in a waiting room. They sat with another candidate (a confederate of the experimenter) in one of two conditions:

A) Mr. Clean – dressed in a smart suit, carrying a briefcase opened to reveal a slide rule and books.

B) Mr. Dirty – dressed in an old T-shirt and jeans, slouched over a cheap sex novel.

The self-esteem of participants with Mr. Dirty increased whilst those with Mr. Clean decreased! No mention was made of how this affected the subjects’ performance in the interview.

Self-esteem affects performance at numerous tasks, though (Coopersmith, 1967), so one could expect Mr. Dirty’s subjects to perform better than Mr. Clean.

Even though self-esteem might fluctuate, there are times when we continue to believe good things about ourselves, even when evidence to the contrary exists. This is known as the perseverance effect.

Miller and Ross (1975) showed that people who believed they had socially desirable characteristics continued in this belief even when the experimenters tried to get them to believe the opposite.

Does the same thing happen with bad things if we have low self-esteem?  Maybe not. Perhaps with very low self-esteem, all we believe about ourselves might be bad.

The ideal self refers to the person an individual aspires to become. It embodies one’s goals, ambitions, and dreams, encompassing attributes, behaviors, and traits a person values and wishes to possess. This concept is pivotal in understanding personal development and self-concept.

Key points about the ideal self:

• Comparison with Real Self: The ideal self stands in contrast to the “real self,” which represents how a person currently sees themselves. The gap between these two concepts can influence self-esteem. A smaller gap can lead to higher self-esteem, while a larger gap can result in feelings of dissatisfaction or inadequacy.
• Dynamic Nature: The ideal self is not static; it evolves based on life experiences, societal influences, personal aspirations, and changing values.
• Motivation: The ideal self can serve as a motivational force, pushing individuals to pursue personal growth, learn new skills, and strive for self-improvement.
• Potential Pitfalls: While the ideal self can be a source of inspiration, an unattainable or overly perfectionistic ideal self can lead to disappointment, low self-esteem, and mental distress.

Carl Rogers, a humanistic psychologist, emphasized the importance of achieving congruence between the real self and the ideal self for overall psychological well-being.

If there is a mismatch between how you see yourself (e.g., your self-image) and what you’d like to be (e.g., your ideal self), this will likely affect how much you value yourself.

Therefore, there is an intimate relationship between self-image, ego-ideal, and self-esteem. Humanistic psychologists study this using the Q-Sort Method .

A person’s ideal self may not be consistent with what actually happens in the life and experiences of the person. Hence, a difference may exist between a person’s ideal self and actual experience. This is called incongruence.

Where a person’s ideal self and actual experience are consistent or very similar, a state of congruence exists. Rarely, if ever, does a total state of congruence exist; all people experience a certain amount of incongruence.

The development of congruence is dependent on unconditional positive regard . Rogers believed that for a person to achieve self-actualization , they must be in a state of congruence.

Michael Argyle (2008) says there are four major factors that influence its development:

• The ways in which others (particularly significant others) react to us.
• How we think we compare to others
• Our social roles
• The extent to which we identify with other people

Argyle, M. (2008). Social encounters: Contributions to social interaction . Aldine Transaction

Baumeister, R. F. (Ed.) (1999). The self in social psychology . Philadelphia, PA: Psychology Press (Taylor & Francis).

Bee, H. L. (1992). The developing child . London: HarperCollins.

Coopersmith, S. (1967). The antecedents of self-esteem . San Francisco: Freeman.

Kuhn, M. H. (1960). Self-attitudes by age, sex and professional training. Sociological Quarterly , 1, 39-56.

Lewis, M. (1990). Self-knowledge and social development in early life. In L. A. Pervin (Ed.), Handbook of personality (pp. 277-300). New York: Guilford.

Miller, D. T., & Ross, M. (1975). Self-serving biases in the attribution of causality: Fact or fiction? Psychological Bulletin, 82, 213–225

Morse, S. J. & Gergen, K. J. (1970). Social comparison, self-consistency and the concept of self. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology , 16, 148-156.

Rogers, C. (1959). A theory of therapy, personality and interpersonal relationships as developed in the client-centered framework. In (ed.) S. Koch, Psychology: A study of a science. Vol. 3: Formulations of the person and the social context . New York: McGraw Hill.

Self Psychology: Guide to Understanding Your Inner World

Diving headfirst into the world of self psychology , I’ve realized it’s a fascinating field that can unlock many insights about our mental and emotional well-being. Born from the theories of Heinz Kohut, self psychology is based on the belief that our sense of self is shaped by our relationships and experiences throughout life. It’s an intriguing perspective, suggesting that understanding ourselves requires delving deeper into how we connect with others.

In my exploration, I’ve discovered that self psychology focuses heavily on empathy as a tool for healing and personal growth. Empathy isn’t just about understanding another person’s feelings – in this context, it becomes a key component in recognizing our own emotional patterns. By tuning into these patterns through a lens of empathy, we’re given an opportunity to grow and heal past wounds.

So why does all this matter? Well, if you’re like me who believes in continuous personal development, then understanding self psychology could be your next step towards achieving emotional wellness. Through its unique focus on interpersonal relationships and empathy , it provides us with valuable tools to navigate life’s challenges and enrich our connections with others.

Understanding Self Psychology

Let’s delve into an intriguing subject: self psychology. It’s a fascinating branch of psychoanalytic theory and therapy that centers around the concept of the self. As we take this journey together, I’ll be your guide, offering insights culled from years of research and experience.

The roots of self psychology trace back to Heinz Kohut in the 1970s. His groundbreaking work proposed that our sense of self is formed in early childhood through interactions with primary caregivers. It’s not about egocentrism or selfishness; rather it’s about how we perceive ourselves in relation to others and our environment.

Here are a few key aspects of self psychology you should know:

• Selfobjects : These are people or objects that provide us with experiences necessary for psychological health.
• Mirroring : This refers to positive reinforcement from caregivers, which helps build a child’s sense of worth.
• Idealized parental imago : This involves seeing parents as perfect figures, aiding in developing ambition and ideals.

Crucially, disruptions or deficiencies in these processes can lead to what Kohut termed ‘self disorders.’ These might manifest as depression, anxiety, narcissistic tendencies – effects often addressed via therapeutic interventions based on self psychology principles.

But let’s look at some figures. According to the American Psychological Association (APA), approximately 46% of Americans will meet the criteria for at least one DSM-listed mental illness during their lifetime (American Psychological Association) . While it would be oversimplifying matters to attribute all these scenarios directly to ‘self disorders’, understanding the role played by aspects identified by Kohut provides valuable insight into potential treatment paths.

So how does this play out practically? Let me share an example. Suppose someone has grown up without adequate mirroring – they may have a diminished sense of worth due to lack of validation during formative years. In therapy based on self psychology principles, the therapist would work to provide that missing validation, helping to rebuild a healthier sense of self.

In conclusion, understanding self psychology offers a valuable lens through which we can view human behavior and mental health. It’s not just academic – it has real-world applications that can make a profound difference in people’s lives.

Key Concepts of Self Psychology

Exploring the world of self psychology, you’ll quickly find it’s rooted in some key concepts. Let’s delve into these ideas further.

One foundational concept is that of the “selfobject”. This term describes people or experiences we unconsciously use to maintain our sense of self. These could be parents, friends, or even a cherished memory. It’s through these selfobjects we gain understanding and acceptance from others.

Next up is “mirroring”, a process where an individual sees their feelings reflected in someone else’s reaction to them. For example, if I’m upset and a friend notices and expresses concern, that’s mirroring offering validation for my emotions.

Now let me introduce the idea of “idealizing”. In self psychology, this means looking at someone else as stronger or more capable than ourselves – typically as a way to manage fears and insecurities. As children we may idealize parents; as adults perhaps mentors or leaders fill this role.

The fourth important concept is called “twinship”. This involves identifying with others who are similar to us – like when we meet someone new but feel an instant connection because they share our love for vintage vinyl records.

Finally, there’s the concept of “self-cohesion” which refers to maintaining an organized and unified sense of self despite life’s ups and downs.

These five principles work together creating a complex web underpinning how we perceive ourselves within society.

The Role of Empathy in Self Psychology

I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “putting yourself in someone else’s shoes”. That’s a simple way to describe empathy. But in the realm of self psychology, empathy takes on a deeper, more nuanced role. It forms one of the key pillars that shape our understanding and perception of ourselves.

Let’s start by untangling what we mean by empathy in this context. We’re talking about our ability to understand and share the feelings of others, yes. But it’s also about how we internalize those emotions and experiences as part of our identity.

Empathy plays an integral role within self psychology for a number of reasons:

• Self-awareness : Empathy helps us recognize and understand our own emotions better by allowing us to perceive them in others.
• Emotional regulation : By acknowledging others’ emotional states, we learn how to manage our own emotions effectively.
• Relationship building : Empathetic individuals can forge stronger connections with others due to their ability to understand and respect differing perspectives.

Now, let’s delve into some fascinating research on this subject. A study done at Michigan State University found that increased levels of empathy lead to higher degrees of self-esteem and lower levels of social anxiety[^1^]. Isn’t that interesting? It goes to show just how closely interwoven empathy is with our sense of self.

So what happens when there are deficiencies in empathy? Well, lack thereof can lead to difficulties in forming relationships, understanding personal feelings, or dealing with stressful situations. Without adequate empathic skills, these challenges become all too real for many individuals.

By now it should be clear: Empathy isn’t just about feeling bad for someone who’s had a tough day. It’s an essential element in the foundation of self psychology, influencing how we see ourselves and navigate our social world.

[^1^]: Konrath SH, O’Brien EH, Hsing C. Changes in dispositional empathy in American college students over time: A meta-analysis. Pers Soc Psychol Rev. 2011;15(2):180-198.

How Self Psychology Differs from Other Psychoanalytic Theories

Let’s dive into the distinct world of self psychology. This is a terrain that diverges significantly from other psychoanalytic theories. It’s like taking a different road on a well-worn map, journeying through new landscapes of understanding.

Unlike traditional psychoanalysis, which emphasizes unconscious drives and instincts, self psychology puts the emphasis squarely on the development and maintenance of the self. It’s all about how we construct our identity, how we view ourselves within our environment. Think of it as looking at an art piece – where classical psychoanalysis would look at the artist’s technique and symbolism, self psychology would focus on why and how the painting makes us feel.

In addition to this shift in focus, there’s another key difference worth mentioning: empathy is central in self psychology. Instead of interpreting or analyzing actions like most psychoanalytic theories do, practitioners here seek to understand experiences from their patient’s perspective.

Here are some bullet points to summarize:

• Traditional psychoanalysis focuses on unconscious drives; self psychology emphasizes the development and maintenance of the self.
• Self-psychologists rely heavily on empathetic understanding rather than interpretation or analysis.

It’s not unusual for these differences to lead people towards one theory over another based upon personal preference or therapeutic need. As with any psychological approach though, what matters most isn’t what sets it apart but how effective it proves for individuals seeking help and understanding .

Practical Applications of Self Psychology in Therapy

In my experience, it’s been proven time and again that self psychology plays a significant role in therapeutic practices. These applications aren’t just theory – they’ve got real-world impact.

One major application is in the treatment of mental health disorders such as anxiety and depression. By helping patients understand their own minds better, therapists can guide them towards healthier thought patterns and behaviors. For instance, a person with social anxiety might come to realize that they’re not actually being judged as harshly by others as they believe.

Another practical use of self psychology lies in the realm of personal development. Many individuals seek therapy not because they’re dealing with a specific disorder, but simply because they want to improve their overall quality of life. In these cases, understanding one’s own motivations, desires, strengths and weaknesses can be incredibly beneficial.

Let’s look at some numbers here:

These statistics highlight the potential power of self-understanding – when we know ourselves better, we can take more effective action to improve our lives.

It’s also worth noting how this approach aids in relationship counseling. Understanding oneself is key to understanding others; recognizing our own needs allows us to better comprehend and respect those of our partners. This leads to improved communication and empathy within relationships – vital components for any successful partnership.

Finally yet importantly comes its contribution towards stress management. As modern life becomes increasingly hectic, strategies for managing stress become ever more necessary. Here too self psychology shines; by identifying what aspects of life cause us the most stress (and why), we can develop personalized strategies for coping more effectively.

To summarize: whether it’s mental health disorders or personal development goals; relationship issues or stress management strategies – self psychology has practical applications across the board!

Impact and Criticisms of Self Psychology

I’ve spent a considerable amount of time studying the field of self psychology , and I’ve noticed both its profound impact and the criticisms it has faced over the years. Let’s start with its influence.

Self psychology, introduced by Heinz Kohut in the 1970s, has significantly shaped our understanding of human behavior. It’s given us a fresh perspective on how we view ourselves and others around us. The theory emphasizes empathy as an essential tool for understanding individual experiences, which has resonated deeply within therapeutic practices.

For instance, self psychologists have long advocated for using empathetic responses to help clients transform their self-views positively. This approach is now widely adopted across various psychotherapy models – illustrating just one example of how self psychology can permeate beyond its domain.

However, no theory is without criticism and self psychology isn’t exempt from this rule. One notable critique stems from the argument that it might be overly focused on empathy at times. Detractors argue that such emphasis could inadvertently encourage narcissistic tendencies or deter individuals from taking personal responsibility for their actions.

Another criticism often thrown at this school of thought revolves around its lack in addressing societal factors impacting mental health. Critics argue that focusing primarily on internal processes may ignore external influences such as cultural norms, socioeconomic status or oppressive systems that contribute to psychological distress.

There are also debates concerning empirical validation of some aspects associated with self psychology. While plenty of qualitative evidence supports this perspective, it’s been suggested more robust quantitative research is needed to solidify some claims made by followers of this theoretical model.

So there you have it—an insight into some impacts and criticisms surrounding self psychology :

• Deepened our understanding through empathy
• Transformed therapeutic practices
• Faced backlash for possibly promoting narcissism
• Critiqued for not sufficiently considering societal factors
• Called upon for further empirical support

It’s evident that while self psychology has made significant strides in shaping our understanding of the psyche, it’s not without its fair share of criticism. Yet, this dynamic interplay between praise and critique is part of what drives the field forward; fostering growth, refinement and progress within psychological discourse.

Case Studies Highlighting the Use of Self Psychology

Delving into self psychology, it’s important to explore real-life scenarios that showcase its effectiveness. A few case studies will illuminate this.

Firstly, let’s talk about Tom. He was a 35-year-old man who struggled with feelings of inadequacy and isolation since childhood. By using self psychology techniques, his therapist helped him understand these feelings were rooted in early experiences with unresponsive caregivers. Recognizing his own agency in addressing these issues, Tom gradually improved his relationships and developed a healthier sense of self-worth.

Then there’s Mary, a high-achieving executive plagued by burnout and anxiety. Her therapist used the principles of self psychology to uncover her deep-seated need for approval and success, stemming from her harshly critical parents. As she began to recognize her intrinsic value outside of achievements, Mary found more balance in her life and work.

Finally, consider John who grappled with anger issues that damaged his personal relationships. Guided by self psychology principles from his therapist, John realized he had been suppressing feelings of abandonment from an early age which manifested as rage in adulthood. Understanding this allowed him to manage his anger more effectively .

These are just three examples but they highlight how self psychology can be used:

• To help individuals gain insight into their emotional struggles
• Understand their behavior is often rooted in past experiences
• Realize they have the power to change negative patterns

The goal isn’t just symptom relief – it’s meaningful change leading to healthier lives! And as shown above, even though everyone’s journey is unique – self psychology can be a valuable tool on the path to healing.

Concluding Thoughts on Self Psychology

I can’t help but feel a sense of awe when I think about the complexity and depth of self psychology. The journey into understanding our own mind is not just enlightening, it’s also empowering. It gives us tools to grow, to heal, and fundamentally, to understand ourselves better.

In my exploration of self psychology, I’ve discovered that we’re essentially the architects of our own reality. Our perceptions shape our experiences – something that’s beautifully encapsulated in the theories of self psychology.

Here are some key takeaways from this exploration:

• Self-understanding aids personal growth: Being aware of your thoughts and feelings isn’t an end in itself. Rather, it’s a route to greater self-improvement.
• Inner reflection boosts mental health: Regular introspection can lead to improved mental health as you begin addressing your inner issues rather than ignoring them.
• Empathy is vital: Understanding yourself allows for increased empathy towards others as you become more aware of similarities in human experience.

These points underscore why I believe self psychology should be embraced more widely. It’s not just about diagnosing disorders or treating mental illnesses – though those are important aspects too – it’s about fostering a deep understanding within ourselves.

As we navigate through life with its ups and downs, having an intimate knowledge of our inner workings can serve as a compass guiding us on our path. After all, knowing oneself truly is the beginning of wisdom.

So here’s my challenge for you: delve deeper into your mind; explore your thoughts and emotions; question why you react the way you do to certain situations. This might make all the difference between simply existing and living a fulfilled life.

To say that exploring self psychology has been fascinating would be an understatement for me. But remember – this isn’t a one-time event; it’s an ongoing journey where there will always be something new to learn about yourself!

That being said, I hope this exploration of self psychology has been as enlightening for you as it’s been for me. Despite its complexities, it’s a worthwhile endeavor that can lead to a more profound understanding of who we are and why we behave the way we do. Remember: when it comes to our minds, there is always more than meets the eye.

Related Posts

Cracking the Anxious-Avoidant Code

Deflection: Unraveling the Science Behind Material Bending

Calculate for all schools

Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, tell us about yourself essay examples.

I'm applying to some scholarships, and some of them have a 'tell us about yourself' essay prompt. I'm a little unsure of where to start and how to structure this essay. Can anyone share some examples or tips on how I can write an engaging, effective essay without sounding cliché or braggy?

Sure, I can provide some guidance on structuring a "tell us about yourself" essay and provide tips on making it engaging and effective without sounding cliché or braggy.

1. Start with an attention-grabbing hook: Open your essay with a brief anecdote, piece of dialogue, or thought-provoking statement that reveals something interesting about you.

Example: "As I stood on the roof of my family's house in [hometown], peering through my homemade telescope, I was struck by the vastness of the night sky."

2. Focus on a specific aspect of yourself: Rather than trying to cover every aspect of your life, pick a theme or personal characteristic that plays a major role in your interests, experiences, and goals.

Example: "My curiosity about the universe and the natural world led me to volunteer at a local science center, where I conducted hands-on experiments with visitors of all ages."

3. Provide a brief background: Give some context to the topic you're discussing, such as your upbringing, community, or family background, if it's relevant to the theme.

Example: "Growing up in a small, rural town, I didn't have the same access to resources and educational opportunities as kids in larger cities, but my determination to learn about the world around me never waned."

4. Showcase your growth and accomplishments: Talk about specific experiences, achievements, or events that shaped your development, values, or interests. Be humble but honest about your achievements, and focus on how they've impacted your growth rather than dwelling on the awards themselves.

Example: "Despite the challenges, I pursued my passion for astronomy and managed to secure a coveted summer internship at a renowned observatory, where I worked alongside professionals and contributed to a research project."

5. Connect your past experiences to your future goals: Explain how the things you've learned and accomplished thus far have motivated and prepared you for your future academic and career aspirations.

Example: "My experiences have confirmed my passion for science and astronomy, leading me to pursue a degree in astrophysics and dedicate myself to researching the mysteries of our universe."

6. Close with a memorable statement: Finish your essay by leaving a lasting impression on the reader, perhaps by tying back to your opening hook or sharing an inspiring thought.

Example: "As I continue to explore the cosmos, both academically and personally, I'll never forget those nights spent stargazing in my hometown and the curiosity that propelled me forward."

Remember, a well-rounded and engaging "tell us about yourself" essay will focus on a specific aspect or theme, be genuine and personal, and effectively showcase your growth and future aspirations. Good luck with your scholarship applications!

About CollegeVine’s Expert FAQ

CollegeVine’s Q&A seeks to offer informed perspectives on commonly asked admissions questions. Every answer is refined and validated by our team of admissions experts to ensure it resonates with trusted knowledge in the field.

Knowing Me, Myself And I: What Psychology Can Contribute To Self-knowledge

How well do you know yourself? It's a question many of us struggle with, as we try to figure out how close we are to who we actually want to be. In a new report in Perspectives on Psychological Science , psychologist Timothy D. Wilson from the University of Virginia describes theories behind self-knowledge (that is, how people form beliefs about themselves), cites challenges psychologists encounter while studying it, and offers ways we can get to know ourselves a little better.

The study of self-knowledge has tended to focus on how accurate we are at determining our own internal states, such as our emotions, personality, and attitudes. However, Wilson notes that self-knowledge can be broadened to include memory, like recalling how we felt in the past, and prospection, predicting how we will feel in the future. Knowing who we were and who we will be are as important to self-knowledge as knowing who we are in the present. And while a number of researchers are conducting studies that are applicable to those various facets of self-knowledge, Wilson observes that there is not much communication between them, one reason this field is challenging to investigate.

Although it can be fairly simple to assess how people's attitudes change over time--that is, have them predict how they will feel at certain time and then actually measure their feelings at that time-- it is more difficult to measure people's current self-knowledge accurately. Some methods of acquiring accurate information on a person's feelings or their personality are to compare reports from their peers and study their nonverbal behavior. However, Wilson has "great faith in the methodological creativity" of his "fellow social psychologists" and is confident that questions raised by these types of experiments will be answered in the next few years.

Although Wilson acknowledges all the interesting findings that have come out of new technologies, such as fMRI, he cautions that those type of studies may not be very relevant to studying issues associated with self-knowledge.

There are a number of theories that aim to describe self-knowledge by a dual-process model, pitting the unconscious against the conscious. Wilson notes that these theories are pessimistic in that they view the unconscious as something that cannot be breached. However, he remarks that "self-knowledge is less a matter of careful introspection than of becoming an excellent observer of oneself."

Wilson suggests some ways that can help us learn more about ourselves, such as really attempting to be objective when considering our behaviors and trying to see ourselves through the eyes of other people. Another way of knowing ourselves better is to become more aware of findings from psychological science. Wilson concludes, "Most of us pay attention to medical findings that inform us about our bodies (e.g., that smoking tobacco is harmful), and can learn about our psychological selves in the same way."

• Intelligence
• Borderline Personality Disorder
• Social Psychology
• Educational Psychology
• Cognitive dissonance
• Social psychology
• Erikson's stages of psychosocial development
• What is knowledge?
• Theory of cognitive development

Story Source:

Materials provided by Association for Psychological Science . Note: Content may be edited for style and length.

Journal Reference :

• Know Thyself . Perspectives on Psychological Science , (in press)

Cite This Page :

Explore More

• Sound-Suppressing Silk Can Create Quiet Spaces
• Material 'Better Than Graphene'
• High-Performance Solar Cells
• Powerful Quantum Computers
• Genetic Defect Behind Cerebral Palsy
• Flexible Robot: Caterbot? Robatapillar?
• Universal, Long-Lasting Flu Shot
• Better Vision from CRISPR Gene Editing Trial
• Why Venus Has Almost No Water
• Stellar Light Surrounding Ancient Quasars

Trending Topics

Strange & offbeat.

• Career Advisor
• Career Coach
• Career Counselling
• What Should I Study?
• Business School
• Best MBA Schools
• Business Analytics
• Business Degrees
• Management Courses
• Marketing Courses
• MBA Online Courses
• Project Management
• Education Masters
• Health Management
• Mental Health
• Mental Health Nursing
• Nursing Degrees
• Nurse Postgraduate
• Psychology Courses
• Psychology Degree
• Social Work
• Cyber Security
• Data Analytics
• Data Science
• Masters Degrees
• Legal Overview

Why I Study Psychology (10 Essays)

Why I Study Psychology  is a collection of short essays. Each student explains their motivation for choosing psychology.

Psychology students are often motivated by personal experiences and a wish for healthier, happier communities. The essays demonstrate the value from having a vision for your career – whether it’s detailed or “big picture” – before you start a  psychology degree . Having a long-term goal in mind offers a reliable source of study motivation.

Why I Chose Psychology Essays

As part of a national essay competition, current and future psychology students were asked to explain their study motivation. Each student describes in 250 words or less (a) why I chose psychology as a major and (b) how I’m motivated to succeed at psychology studies. The best, most inspiring essays are published here.

1. Motivation

We all know that there will almost always be something to do that sounds much more appealing than our studies, so why do we study if there is something better? Motivation, that’s why. Everyone has their own motivating factor that keeps them in line with studying. Mine is pretty general and that is my future.

I have dreams of becoming a psychologist and helping people throughout my life. I also have a huge passion for American Sign Language. I plan to merge these two goals into one for  my future career . I don’t want to be just any psychologist, I want to be a psychologist that is open to Deaf people and hearing people alike.  I want Deaf people to feel comfortable coming to me without the need of a third person interpreter who is usually a stranger . Many Deaf people feel uncomfortable visiting a psychologist because of the need for a third person. I plan to make a step towards breaking that barrier by being able to signor speak with any patient who comes to me.

With all these huge goals I know that I have to be very on top of studies and make sure I continue to stay on track and do my best. All of these reasons put together make up my ideal future and therefore my motivation to study.

~ Hannah Reis, Palomar College

2. My Dream

We live in a world filled with hurt and suffering, and a place that is not equal for all. My dream is to leverage my unique set of skills, abilities, privileges, resources, and knowledge in a way that increases equality and privilege for all (not just people with white skin). I am pursuing a degree in Industrial and Organizational Psychology which combines psychology and business.

I feel most alive when I am volunteering with my family at The Christian Children’s Home of Ohio (CCHO) which is a non-profit orphanage for children. I love working with the children there, and it hurts my heart when I see them being forced to leave once they are eighteen without any further aid or support. Due to this fact, I have decided that after I get several years of work experience applying psychology principles to the business world,  I want to start my own non-profit organization that aids young adults who grew up in foster care or orphanages . Once they have turned eighteen the government will no longer provide very much aid to them; I want to supply them with the additional skills and services that they need to make it in the real world, and give them the emotional support that they may not have.

One of the main services I want to provide them is taking them to do mission work because the best way to grow as a person and gain perspective is through service and travel. When college gets hard, I hold on tight to this dream because I know my studies will help me achieve this dream.

~ Alyssa Powers, The University of Akron

3. A Catalyst for Change

The incredible transformation I have experienced in my own life from the power of the therapeutic relationship motivates me to immerse myself in my studies and move closer towards my goal of becoming a psychologist. Recognizing how the quality of my own life has been profoundly enhanced by self-reflection, the invaluable lesson of how to learn from suffering, and coming to a deeper understanding of who I am, encourages me to try and be a catalyst for this kind of change in other’s lives. I’m motivated to empower people to feel confident enough in who they are that they don’t feel the need to bring others down.

When life as a student feels exceptionally challenging, I remind myself of the impact that the work I wish to practice has on people’s lives and those around them. I strongly believe large scale change happens on the individual level first, and if we want to see a world where we value the earth and all the people living on it, we have to do the work with ourselves first.  I want to help people in their transformation towards becoming more unconditionally loving, tolerant, and compassionate people . I think when people are more comfortable with, and accepting of, who they are, they are consequently kinder and more loving towards those around them. Encouraging this kind of growth first on an individual level, and ultimately on a global level, motivates me to not only get through, but thrive within my program.

~ Hannah Freund, California Institute of Integral Studies

4. Reshaping Mental Health

People who are given psychiatric diagnoses experience some of the worst prejudice and discrimination. They are more likely to be the victims of violence, have a harder time securing jobs and housing, and constantly come face-to-face with the harmful stereotypes that state that these individuals are violent and unpredictable. As such, much research needs to be done to understand the cause of such distress, as well as to develop effective interventions and achieve healthy minds.

Our current mental health paradigm positions mental distress as biological in origin and best treated with medical interventions. However this paradigm has conversely led to an increase in stigma and an increase in the number of people on disability for mental health related reasons. I was one of the fortunate few who was able to pursue a college degree despite being given a severe diagnosis and a hopeless prognosis. However, I know that much of my success has been due to luck and privilege, and  the opportunities that I have been afforded are an exception, not a rule. I am striving to change that.

It is my hope that, through increased research and advocacy, society can come to understand that extreme distress is often a message about something that is wrong in a person’s world, and as such, is profoundly meaningful and can be understood. Furthermore, by understanding the psychosocial origins of distress – trauma, poverty, inequality, etc. – we can refocus upstream and create policies that protect against these stressors in the first place.

~ name withheld, Mount Holyoke College

5. C’s Get Degrees

It is said that “C’s get degrees”, but that isn’t enough for me. C’s show an average amount of work, an average amount of time, an average amount of effort. “Average” is not something that I want to be known as. I want to be known as the girl who kept moving forward, went above and beyond, and never looked back. My driving force is making my family proud and reaching my ultimate goal—becoming a school psychologist.

I am the very first in my family to attend college. Every time the topic of school or my future is mentioned, I can see on their faces that they are overwhelmed with pride. When I received my Associate’s degree, seeing my grandpa cry made me realize how special my academic journey is to them. They have given up so much and have supported me in every way, making them proud is the very least I could do in return.

Becoming a school psychologist has been my dream career since I was in middle school.  The thought of being able to connect and help a child grow both academically and socially is the greatest reward I could ever receive . Every time I am procrastinating typing a paper, not studying when I know I should have, or wanting to give up on a difficult problem, I think about my end goal. Making a difference to even just one child with make all of school worth it.

~ Haleigh Cordeiro, California Polytechnic State University

6. Find Your Unconscious

Psychologists have discovered reasons, stages, and correlations among our biopsychosocial make-up. Over the centuries, they have managed to explain why humans experience what occurs in everyday life. They provide answers when we have questions about ourselves; it is for this reason that I strive to major in psychology.

I believe that I can make people in my environment, as well as myself, healthier by providing some sense of clarity whenever life situations become foggy. My dream is to someday become a successful industrial-psychologist. Why not a clinical psychologist? Working one-on-one with individuals who are struggling would definitely bring me pleasure. However,  I believe that I would have a greater impact within my society by helping larger groups . This dream of mine to become an industrial-psychologist would allow me to make the environment of common day people the most comfortable and enjoyable one.

Through the study of psychology, I will be able to know what qualities are the most necessary to enrich the daily lives of people and ensure that I apply them to my work. What drives me? The fact that I have seen psychologists help my family make sense of one of the most difficult things that we have gone through. Psychologists helped my sister facing anorexia nervosa deal with her disorder and helped my family become a strong support system to aid my sister’s recuperation. I want to know that I can help other people, psychology will open the doors to this dream of mine.

~ Iridian, Cal State University of Long Beach

7. My Dream

Over 22 million children in the United States do not live with their biological mother and father and reside with their grandparents. This means that 3 percent of children living in America face the same situation as me. My father and mother were teenagers when they had me, so raising a baby girl was a difficult task for them. Neither of my parents went to college either, so having me took a toll on their lives. For the both of them, college was an opportunity to better their education and be successful, but with me, that would have been harder for them. Living with my grandparents was the best option for me.

I am currently experiencing teenage life and I can understand why raising a child, when you are only a child yourself, is a daunting responsibility. I commend my parents because they choose to provide a better life for me. They wanted to prevent me from facing adversity, they shielded me from their struggles.  When I enter college, my goal is not just to pass my classes, it is to make something of myself . I know my parents would want that for me.

My dream is to work up to my doctorate and become a psychiatrist, fulfilling every opportunity and experience that comes my way. Psychiatrist  Carl Gustav Jung  once said “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become”, and through my hardship, I choose to overcome and prepare for my destiny.

~ Nina Grizzle

8. Art Therapy

My love for psychology began my junior year when I took the AP course. What was supposed to be a schedule-filling elective credit accidentally grew into a genuine fascination.  I found myself going above and beyond the curriculum purely out of curiosity . My interest in what we were discussing in class every day would often send me down long, thought-provoking paths that motivated me to hunt down explanations to the answers of questions I didn’t know I had. But once I had the answers, they seemed to be demanding further explanation, and I was always more than happy to oblige.

With my future education in this field, I hope to further develop new methods of art therapy that will aid those suffering from different mental disorders and cognitive declines. I feel that experimenting with the effects that art has on people’s brain chemistry will open up a new type of therapy that can be clinically prescribed. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness,  approximately 52.9 million  adults in the United States suffer from mental illnesses. This new form of therapy could possibly improve the mental state of the millions of people impacted while inspiring the creation of art.

~ Taylor Himes, University of Texas San Antonio

9. If You Put Your Mind To It

For as long as I can remember, I knew that I wanted to make a difference in the world. I knew that the first step was to attend an accredited university, and that university happens to be Michigan State. I went into college with the dream of becoming a doctor, however, I had a change of heart.

At the beginning of my freshmen year, the unthinkable happened. My dad committed suicide. My world came crashing down. It was a complete shock. My dad always kept all his feelings masked. I never knew what he was going through, and everyday I regret not paying closer attention. Not a day goes by where I don’t think about him. If only I had known. I could’ve done something. That experience then motivated me to change my major to psychology.

I always wanted to make a difference, and now I know just how I am going to be able to accomplish that dream. I want to help people who are going through what my dad endured.  I want to be there for them, to help them overcome their inner demons. I want to let them know that their lives are worth living.  Losing a family member to suicide is one of the most detrimental events that anyone can ever endure, and if I can one day prevent someone from experiencing that, then I would have accomplished my goal; I will make a difference.

~ Kayla Harper, Michigan State University

10. Motivated by God to Help Others

I’ve heard from so many different people how difficult college can be. Late nights, big tests, difficult and early classes, that doesn’t even sound like fun. The only thing that keeps me moving towards college is the idea of being able to help other people when I graduate.

In December of 2016 I travelled halfway around the world to the Philippines. While I was there I met 15 wonderful children with horrible backgrounds. The love these children missed out on for so many years is heartbreaking. My future goal is to study Psychology and Religion at  Liberty University .

The dream that keeps me motivated to go back to school is the idea that I could help so many people , not just children, but anyone who needs someone willing to listen and talk about their problems. People need more people to care and who want to listen. If people would feel the love that God made for them this world would be a much better place.

~ Trinity Rake, Liberty University

How Long Does It Take to Get a Psychology Degree?

• About Author
• Latest Posts

Writing Team

Latest posts from writing team.

• Best Online Executive MBA in the UK - May 3, 2024
• 7 Proven Time Management Tips for Online Students - April 29, 2024
• Best Online Tutoring Software to Create Training Courses - April 19, 2024

Psychology of Personality: Theories Essay

Introduction.

Individuals convey different psychological lives depending on their environment, social status, among other factors. Nonetheless, just a few psychological behaviors are noticed easily. These include personality, among others. Personality defines the whole mental organization of humans at every stage of their development.

In this regard, various theorists, psychologists and psycho-socialists, as well as psychoanalysts have proposed several theories that they feel describe human behavior and personality. These theorists include Freud, Fromm, Erickson, Bandura, Skinner, Allport, and Rogers, among others. The theories they postulated include psychosexual theory, which was done by Freud and psychosocial theory, which was proposed by Erickson.

Others include behavioral analysis, by Skinner, Bandura’s social cognitive analysis, Allport’s ideas of the psychologically healthy personality, Adler’s Individual Psychology, Rogers’ “person of tomorrow” and Fromm’s Humanistic Psychoanalysis. Some of these theories are complex to understand as they sometimes vary in results depending on the individual. This paper will explore the similarities and differences of pairs of these theories as well as my views on them (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Psychology of personality

Personality psychology is usually defined in terms of mental system of an individual. Moreover, the primary concern of personality is on the most noticeable parts of human’s psychological life. The noticeable parts of an individual form its main elements. Several definitions have come up to describe personality psychology. Most of these have mainly focused on the mental state of individuals. They try to bring out a description of the overall mental system or organization.

It may therefore refer to the complete organization of mentality of an individual at any stage of his/her development. It forms the sense of being human. Every individual conveys some form of personality. Among those usually shown concerns people who are sad or happy, dull or smart, and apathetic or energetic, among others. In essence, personality concerns itself with the pattern of operation of mental systems in individuals (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Freud’s psychosexual theory of personality versus Erikson’s psychosocial theory of personality

Freud postulated his theory on psychosexual development with emphasis on people as pleasure seekers. According to him, people come into the world as seekers of pleasure. He points out that these pleasures are sought from erogenous zones. The zones are wide and require further categorization.

He categorizes the theory of psychosexual development into two ideas. These are the fact that one’s childhood experiences determines his future, that is a child’s first few years determines his whole life. This is mainly because the childhood experiences act as a blueprint to future functions. In addition he talks of the fact that development gives a story of how individuals can handle impulses that are antisocial through ways that are sociable. These are categorized in fixation and reaction formation (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Freud’s psychosexual theory of personality

Freud states that people come into the world to seek pleasure. He proposed 5 stages of development, which he felt that people go through, even though he also stated that most people ended up tied to one stage of development than others. The stages of development he gives for this are the oral stage, Anal, Phallic, latency and genital.

The oral stage occurs between birth and one year. In this stage, one may get frustrated at waiting on others or depending on them. A fixation at this state would mean extreme use of oral stimulation. These may include excessive drinking, cigarettes, among others.

The second stage is Anal, which occurs between two to three years. Children are introduced to rules that they are to follow as well as regulations. Libido is therefore focused anally, leading to stinginess, messiness, or stubbornness, among others. These results are only achieved when one remains fixated at this stage. The third stage (phallic) starts between 4-5 years and is characterized with boys’ sexual desire for their mothers, combined with fear of the father’s suspicion and punishment.

This phase of phallic stage is known as Oedipus conflict. It is then followed by castration anxiety. In this phase, the boy ends up renouncing his sexual feelings for his mother for fear of punishment by his father. He then becomes the father’s friend and hopes to have relations with a woman like his father, some day (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

For girls, it is slightly different in the phallic stage, this is because they develop desire for penis and thinks that their mothers are penis less and therefore unworthy. However, just as the boys renounce their desire for mothers, girls also renounce their desire for fathers. The fourth stage is Latency, which starts from about age 7 to puberty. The stage is also known as a period of rest as there is no significant developmental occurrences.

The fifth and last, involves genital developments, which starts at puberty. The child begins to utilize the roles of libido and genitals. However, these feelings act as a source of anxiety since they remind them of feelings for their parents in earlier stages (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Erikson’s psychosocial theory of personality

Erickson provided one of the best known stages of development in personality psychology. His main emphasis is on ego identity which is identified as a sense of self awareness. In this regard, Erickson postulates eight stages of development. These are majorly on conflicts. They include Trust vs. mistrust, Autonomy vs. Doubt and shame, Inferiority vs. industry, confusion vs. identity, isolation vs. intimacy, stagnation vs. generativity and integrity vs. Despair (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Similarities

The two theorists have several similarities. These include the fact that just like Freud, Erickson believed that personality involves several stages of development (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Differences

The two theories also have points of divergence. For instance, Freud speaks of 5 stages of development while Erickson talks of 8 stages of development (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Skinner’s Behavioral analysis versus Bandura’s social cognitive theory

Skinner was one of the pioneers of behavioral analysis in his time. He spent his time on physiology and emphasized the need for experimental results as opposed to observation of phenomena studied. He therefore placed much of his behavioral analysis methods on control of experimental variables.

On the other hand, Bandura emphasizes on observation learning in his concept of social cognitive approach. He puts more efforts on the social origins of individual’s behavior. In addition to this, he considers the contributions to this behavior that arises from cognitive thought.

His theory on social cognitive approach diverges from the common theories that usually associate cognitive factors with human functioning. These theories usually convey cognitive factors to function in the absence of direct enforcement. Enforcement of laws and regulations in a society as well as punishment of those who violate it proves more relevant to performance than acquisition according to Bandura (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Skinner’s Behavioral analysis

Skinner emphasized on control of experimental variables as opposed to observation of phenomenon. Through this, he was able to device apparatus that could control some specific behaviors of rats. Skinner was also able to distinguish his method of behavioral analysis from stimulus response postulated by Pavlov.

This he did by first acknowledging Pavlov’s work and then emphasizing on operant conditioning. In addition, Skinner tried his best to use his theories on making a better world. In this, he used his theory on operant technique the emphasized positive reinforcement (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Bandura’s social cognitive theory

Bandura emphasizes on observation learning in his concept of social cognitive approach. He puts more efforts on the social origins of individual’s behavior. In addition to this, he considers the contributions to this behavior that arises from cognitive thought. His theory on social cognitive approach diverges from the common theories that usually associate cognitive factors with human functioning.

These theories usually convey cognitive factors to function in the absence of direct enforcement. Enforcement of laws and regulations in a society as well as punishment of those who violate it proves more relevant to performance than acquisition according to Bandura (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Both theories of Bandura and Skinner dismiss performance through simple observation learning and instead focus on control as in Skinner’s theory and reinforcements as in Bandera’s theory (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

While Bandura emphasizes on enforcements such as laws to achieve performance and in the process utilize his approach of social cognitive theory, Skinner emphasizes on control of experimental variables behavioral analysis (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Allport’s ideas of the psychologically healthy personality versus Rogers’ “person of tomorrow”

Gordon Allport’s main point of emphasis was on the uniqueness of every individual. He therefore used this to develop his theory of personality that stressed on making a psychologically healthy personality. To achieve this, he had to differ with other theorists, especially those who professed non-humanistic positions.

However, Allport also acknowledged other theorists by accepting a number of them. Rogers, on the other hand, is widely known for his client-centered therapy. He came up with a format if/then which je used in developing his theory (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Allport’s ideas of the psychologically healthy personality

The main point of emphasis for Allport was on the uniqueness of every individual. He therefore used this to develop his theory of personality that stressed on making a psychologically healthy personality. In his theory of a psychologically healthy personality, Allport believed that these individuals (with psychologically healthy personality) were motivated by present. This is the commonly conscious drive. In addition, he believed that these individuals sought to reduce tensions as well as renew them.

Allport also believed that individuals were capable of conveying proactive behavior. This implied that people can behave in new and creative ways that may be instrumental in shaping their growth and subsequent changes. His theory differs with the traditional nomothetic science. He therefore defines personality as a vibrant association within a person. The structures of personality as entailed by Allport are personality proprium and dispositions.

In his theory, the source of motivation for psychologically healthy personality is out of their need to fit into the new environment. They are therefore very likely to engage in the following proactive behaviors: insight and humor, realistic view of surrounding, extension of self-sense, self-acceptance, unifying philosophy of life as well as warm relationships with neighbors or other individuals (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Rogers’ “person of tomorrow”

Rogers, on the other hand, is widely known for his client-centered therapy. He came up with a format if/then which je used in developing his theory. He used his client-centered format to develop a person centered theory which emphasized on personality issues. The theory depends on two assumptions.

These are actualizing tendency as well as formative tendency. He believes that individuals have the capacity to grow and change, but only if certain favorable conditions are met. The theory therefore relies on optimism and encourages free choice, conscious motivation and uniqueness of persons, among others (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

The two theorists emphasize uniqueness of individuals when their methods are well followed. The two theories also focus on motivation which is essential in personality development (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Rogers used his if/then format, which is client centered, to develop personality, while Allport emphasizes on Morphogenic Science to develop his theory. The format used by the two theorists differs widely on their research (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

View of personality development using Adler’s Individual Psychology and Fromm’s Humanistic Psychoanalysis

Adler’s individual psychology.

Adler developed theories on birth order. He believed that the order of birth in families affected children’s personality. In this regard, he holds that first-borns undergo more problems than the rest of the children. This, according to him, is due to the sudden change in attention, after considerable pampering, when the other siblings arrive.

He also believes that the middle born children tend to have it easy as they have the luxury of trying to achieve superiority over their elders as well as remaining well above their younger siblings. The last born, on the other hand, is likely to experience major personality problems, according to Adler. This is because they get more pampering than even the oldest children do. They are therefore significantly inferior to their siblings and unprepared to face the problems of the world (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

• Fromm’s Humanistic Psychoanalysis

Fromm describes three methods that would assist an individual to escape from freedom. These are Authoritarianism, destructiveness and Automaton conformity. Fromm explains that freedom forms the greatest problems to majority of people. He also believes that freedom comes with inability to gain authority as well as an overwhelming loneliness. According to him, people employ different methods of alleviating anxiety, which may be directly linked to their opinion of freedom.

These include individualization, destructiveness, conformity and automaton as well as authoritarianism. In authoritarianism, people tend to submit to entities that they believe are greater than them to escape freedom. They may also make themselves authoritative over those who, in their opinion are enemies. These authorities may be religious, political, or social leaders or beliefs (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

View of personality development

These theories are important in establishing the forces that drive individuals. For instance, Fromm, talks of our need to escape from freedom, which leads to anxiety and loneliness. He also talks of the techniques we employ to help us manage these problems. These include destructiveness, automaton conformity, as well as authoritarianism.

In concluding, he states that people should embrace freedom, as this is the only healthy way of dealing with their problems as well as attaining individuality. This is quite important in encouraging the world to be original and unique in their activities. This will make them poses the highly needed individuality. Adler, on the other hand, talks of the drive or motivational force on individuals.

He then explains that those who desire to be important people in society feel so out of inferiority in their respective desires. If this problem exceeds, one may experience inferiority complex, which is a complete opposite of striving for superiority. This theory applies to individuals who know their drives; the knowledge of what drives an individual helps him /her manage the goals. It also helps save people from developing inferiority complex due to unattainable objectives (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Several theories have been brought forward to explain psychology of personality. These include individual psychology and humanistic psychoanalytic, psychosexuality, among others. These theories were developed by various theorists such as Freud, Adler, Erickson, Bandura, Rogers, Allport and Fromm, among others. The paper analyses various theories on psychology of personality including similarities and differences of their pairs, as well as my views on them (Feist & Feist, 2009, p. 12-67).

Reference List

Feist, J. & Feist, G. (2009). Theories of personality (7th ed.). Boston: McGraw-Hill.

• Chicago (A-D)
• Chicago (N-B)

IvyPanda. (2018, October 10). Psychology of Personality: Theories. https://ivypanda.com/essays/psychology-of-personality/

"Psychology of Personality: Theories." IvyPanda , 10 Oct. 2018, ivypanda.com/essays/psychology-of-personality/.

IvyPanda . (2018) 'Psychology of Personality: Theories'. 10 October.

IvyPanda . 2018. "Psychology of Personality: Theories." October 10, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/psychology-of-personality/.

1. IvyPanda . "Psychology of Personality: Theories." October 10, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/psychology-of-personality/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Psychology of Personality: Theories." October 10, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/psychology-of-personality/.

• Comparison and contrast of each of Fromm's Human Needs
• Gordon Allport’s Personality Trait Theory
• Maslow and Allport Psychological Views
• Erich Fromm's Contributions to Social Sciences
• “Toward a Science of Public Opinion” by Floyd H. Allport
• Psychosexual Disorder in Female Gender and the Normal Sexual Functioning
• Psychosexual Development Stages
• Sigmund Freud: Theory of Psychosexual Development Analysis
• Matrix Table and Personality Analysis
• Why do we do what we do?
• History and Causes of the Sexual Deviants in People
• Sex and the city. Media Analysis
• The Psychoanalytic Approach to Personality
• Deviant behavior: Prostitution

The Study Blog

Term Paper Writing Help

If you aren't sure whether you are good at expressing yourself through writing, then if you find it difficult to do so (e.g., when trying to write an english essay), we can help you overcome those obstacles by assisting you in improving your communication through writing. We help students compose essays or other types of papers for their courses. Now is the time to come visit us!

How to Overcome the Complexity of a Nursing Essay

There aren't many alternatives for professional translations. Before writing a good summary of something, you need to know your subject well enough to be able to write an accurate one. A research paper requires mastery of research language, a deep understanding of their subjects to be able to write about them clearly, and a careful consideration of possible problems before proposing solutions. Students often have trouble understanding medical terminology when they first encounter it, because they have never heard of these words before. When writing a cohesive psychology essay, students must be familiar with some psychological concepts. We have a wealth of experience under our belt, so we know where they need help. Although you may be able to find better deals elsewhere, there is no way to tell if these sites offer superior customer service and top-quality results. Read customer reviews before making any online purchases. If you don't think there's a market for them, it's perhaps best to skip them.

Professional Help from Copywriters

If you would like us to write anything from an essay in history to a term paper for you, we’d be happy to oblige. When writing something, there's a precise formula for choosing the best word. You can rest assured that you'll receive an expertly written paper from those who know exactly what they're doing. No need to write anything down today; there are no reasons why you shouldn't let others edit your document for you. Don't waste your time trying to convince them to do it for you, instead, invest it in something more productive! Order term papers online and go there! Founded in a simple belief that we are capable of delivering top-quality content to you, we offer a range of guarantees. Test it out yourself! The results must be presented after all the research has been completed.

Cheap Business Essay Writing Services

Before being accepted into our company, we underwent extensive background checks. Check their credentials to confirm that they have been writing professionally for some time. If they are members of professional associations, check, for instance.

Fun Tips to Spend Orthodox Easter Away from Home

In "Student Life"

Welcome to the New Bloggers

In "Degree Essentials"

Mastering Warwick as a Postgraduate

In "Looking After You"

Comments are closed.

Copyright, 2023

• Relationships

The Unselfish Art of Prioritizing Yourself

Taking care of ourselves and doing what we love is not selfish..

Posted August 17, 2017 | Reviewed by Jessica Schrader

• What Does "Self Help" Mean?
• Find a therapist near me

Most of us are taught from an early age that being selfless is a good thing, and there are many proven benefits of altruism , to both our mental and physical well-being. However, sometimes the messaging we receive to be giving of ourselves, to push ourselves to the limit, be productive, and forgo our needs can be taken to an extreme in our everyday lives. If we’re not attuned to who we are and what we want, we can start to make sacrifices that don’t just hurt or limit us, but actually negatively impact those we care for.

Socrates gave two injunctions: Care for oneself and know oneself. He and other ancient ethicists understood that caring for ourselves is to exhibit an attitude not only toward ourselves, but also toward others and the world, to attend to our own thoughts and attitudes in self-reflection and meditation , and to engage in ascetic practices aimed at realizing an ideal state of being. Maintaining a certain regard for ourselves and engaging in self-compassion and self-care are actually fundamental to creating a good life for ourselves and the people who matter most to us.

Here’s why:

1. When we feel depleted, we have nothing to give.

When we fill our time with responsibilities and constantly prioritize the needs of others over our own, we can drain ourselves of energy and desire. We’ve all experienced the difference between giving from a feeling of having something to offer—happily getting our kids ready, helping a colleague at work, cooking a meal for our partner, doing a favor for a friend, and making ourselves do these same activities because we “should.” The tasks remain the same, but our attitude shifts, largely based on our attitude toward ourselves. If we are kind to ourselves and considerate of our own needs, we are more likely to show up fully for the people to whom we extend ourselves. Otherwise, we may be going through the motions, but not engaging in a way in which everyone benefits—i.e., our kids feel nurtured, our job feels rewarding, our partner feels seen, and our friend feels cared about.

2. Doing what we love recharges us.

When we’re lit up and excited, we have more energy and positivity to offer the people around us. The time a parent “takes off” for a date night or an employee uses to rest instead of working at all hours is not self-centered. Just because it feels good to us doesn’t mean it denies others. In fact, by tending to our own needs and practicing good self-care, we alter the very quality of how we relate to others. Our families, friends, and coworkers get to experience us as the best and fullest versions of ourselves—happy and present.

3. We lose our real selves in the “do, do, do” mentality.

I know many parents who go above and beyond for their kids on a practical level. They literally pack every minute of their day into being chefs, chauffeurs, coaches, and clean-up crews for their kids. I also know people in relationships who focus on doing everything they can think of for their romantic partner. However, when we fall into a cycle of “go, go, go,” we often tally up achievements that we use to prove our worth, but rarely stop to experience what makes our hard work worth it to us. We may sacrifice our own interests altogether or stop enjoying personal connections that make us feel like ourselves. In doing so, we give up aspects of ourselves, but the people close to us also miss out on really knowing us.

4. We can drain others when we don’t get our own needs met.

One of the best pieces of advice my colleague Pat Love gives to parents is to get their adult needs met by other adults. When parents center their entire lives around their kids in an effort to be selfless, they put a lot of pressure on their kids to fulfill their lives and meet their needs. It’s so much better for kids to witness their parents as full and fulfilled people in and of themselves, thereby experiencing their parents’ example and not just their devotion. This is true in all of our relationships. If we don’t practice self-care and find healthy ways to meet our needs as individuals, we tend to have less energy, complain more, drag our feet, feel more resentment, and criticize ourselves and others, all of which can be draining to all the people we are seeking to benefit by setting aside our own wants and needs.

5. We lose ourselves to our “ critical inner voice .”

When we are preoccupied by a drive to be “productive” or “helpful,” it’s valuable to look at what’s pushing us. Are we doing what we do because it makes us or the people we care about happy? Or are we driven by something else? Many of us have an inner critic that tells us we have to achieve certain objectives to be acceptable or worthy. This harsh internal coach tends to attack us from all angles and reinforce the idea that anything we do for ourselves is selfish. When we’re listening to this voice, it’s easy to lose track of what’s really going on around us. Are we living our lives the way we want? Are we really doing justice to the people around us by being present and feeling good? The critical inner voice is a huge distraction that affects our mood and behavior, and it can often be at the helm of an unrealistic desire to be “perfect” and always put others first.

6. We fail to practice self-compassion.

One risk of becoming lost in all the things we "should" be doing for others is that we stop feeling for ourselves. To no surprise, research has shown that being kind to ourselves and practicing self-compassion improves our well-being. It also benefits the people around us. Researcher Kristin Neff has argued that having a kind attitude toward ourselves actually makes us better able to look at our mistakes and make real changes. In addition to self-kindness, she describes two other key elements to self-compassion— mindfulness , which involves learning to accept our thoughts and feelings without over-identifying and being overcome by them; and a sense of common humanity, which means not seeing ourselves as isolated or different in our struggles. Each of these three elements is important to practice because they help us stay attuned to ourselves, who we are, and what we need without judging ourselves too harshly or feeling unworthy or different from everyone else. If we can take time to practice self-compassion, we can feel more comfortable being ourselves, and extend this attitude to others.

7. Our stress hurts us and those close to us.

Our failure to stop and check in with ourselves and make time for the things that are meaningful to us can increase our stress. Filling our lives with responsibilities can generate a cycle in which being stressed feels like the norm. As a society, we are unapologetic about our stress levels, even wearing them like a badge of honor, proving our value. However, stress takes a serious toll on our mental and physical health. These effects often catch up with us and prevent us from enjoying our lives, not to mention affecting how we relate to others, often leading to more conflict, tension, and acting out in our relationships.

8. Driving ourselves can impair our performance.

Research by The Energy Project recently found that workers who didn’t practice good self-care, like getting enough sleep, often have trouble focusing on one thing and are easily distracted. Their findings led the project’s CEO, Tony Schwartz, to conclude , “If you do not put your needs first, then ultimately you will not be able to perform well and show up for others consistently and happily.” Taking care of ourselves doesn’t just make our personal lives better; it also makes us into stronger assets at work.

For many of us, there are good lessons to be learned about being generous and giving of ourselves. However, when we lose touch with the grand passions and tiny quirks that make us who we are, we diminish the quality of our lives. It’s all too easy to categorize certain pursuits as selfish rather than fighting to maintain the things that make us come alive. However, when we do make time for our wants and needs, we are more alive to the world around us, more available, and more giving of our fullest selves. In effect, we are our least selfish, while still honoring our sense of self.

Lisa Firestone, Ph.D. , is a clinical psychologist, an author, and the Director of Research and Education for the Glendon Association.

• Find a Therapist
• Find a Treatment Center
• Find a Psychiatrist
• Find a Support Group
• Find Online Therapy
• United States
• Brooklyn, NY
• Chicago, IL
• Houston, TX
• Los Angeles, CA
• New York, NY
• Portland, OR
• San Diego, CA
• San Francisco, CA
• Seattle, WA
• Washington, DC
• Asperger's
• Bipolar Disorder
• Chronic Pain
• Eating Disorders
• Passive Aggression
• Personality
• Goal Setting
• Positive Psychology
• Stopping Smoking
• Low Sexual Desire
• Child Development
• Therapy Center NEW
• Diagnosis Dictionary
• Types of Therapy

Understanding what emotional intelligence looks like and the steps needed to improve it could light a path to a more emotionally adept world.

• Emotional Intelligence
• Gaslighting
• Affective Forecasting
• Neuroscience